Things That Make Me Go Hmm...

I literally have nothing to blog about. Sorry guys, life is not too exciting right now. For the past two days, I have been working as a model home greeter (yes, this is a glorious summer job). It is a super easy way to earn some cash, but I get really bored while I am here. Alas, I begin to ponder. Which leads me to the topic of today's post. Warning: I apologize in advance for anything I say that may offend someone. It tends to happen pretty regularly. You have been warned.

Things that are currently making me go, hmm...

1. The selection of men chosen for The Bachelorette this season. 

If I was Des, I would have sent all of these guys home the first night, called up my best friend and let ABC pay for us to fly around the world going on vacation together. Referring to this group of people as "men" is really a stretch if you ask me. I haven't seen a single one of them do anything that remotely resembles something "manly" all season. All they do is play dress up, hold hands and cry. Sounds like a little girl's slumber party to me. Plus, I feel like I really need to warn girls my age out there who are still looking for Mr. Right. I have no idea where ABC found these guys, but let me tell you that your average 30 year old man does not have wash-board abs, zero body hair and a wardrobe that consists of only neon-colored, tissue-thin, skin-tight t-shirts. If you want to date someone with those qualities, then you are actually looking for a 20 year old sorority girl. Sure they might look pretty on the TV screen, but what it all boils down to is simply no. Just say no, Des.

2. Lots and lots of emoticons.

I don't understand why people feel the need to use an excessive amount of emoticons when they text. Occasionally, I use one and only one emoticon :) That's it. Perhaps, I am just missing the point. Why can't you just type out what you are trying to say, rather than making me try to decipher your hieroglyph-style text message. It is called a "text" message after all. We aren't playing Pictionary here people. But, hey, if using lots of emoticons makes you really happy then keep on doing it. This is America after all. Just know that you won't be getting any emoticon filled messages from this girl. Actually...maybe I will start sending people messages that only contain emoticons and see if they can figure out what I am trying to say. Bwahaha. Additionally, I am curious as to why my iPhone contains so many options for emoticons. There are like 20 different types of buildings available for me to include in my message. Why buildings? What could I possibly be saying in a text message that would warrant a tiny picture of a power plant? I will also have you know that there are two styles of fried chicken available for your emjoi texting pleasure. Just in case that drumstick was not enough to get your point across, you can include yet another tiny piece of fried chicken into your text message. Gosh, how could we ever possibly communicate without this technology?

3. Adults who do not own agenda planners. 

Whenever I make an appointment at the doctor's office or somewhere, I always get out my planner and write it down. The person behind the desk always looks at me like I've just pulled a live penguin out of my purse. It's called a planner, people, get one. I feel like everyone (at least all adults) should own a planner. Yes, that fancy calendar feature on your iPhone counts too...if you actually use it effectively. Every time I encounter someone who is late or forgets to do something, I say, "did you have it in your planner?" and their response is usually, "my what?". Hey, I bet if you would have written it down in your planner then you wouldn't have forgotten it. Hence, the concept behind this nifty invention. So everyone has some homework this week...if you do not own a planner, go buy one. I'd be happy to give you a recommendation if you need one. I have been obsessed with planners since birth, so I'm pretty much an expert. Yes, I was that kid in elementary school who had my own planner. Listen, even my dad always used a planner and if Rocky can do it then you can too.

Well, I think that is enough pointless rambling for today, y'all. Enjoy your Wednesday!

Adventures at Mayo

I have spent the last two days partying with my mother-in-law in her hospital room. She had surgery yesterday morning for a partial knee replacement and I have been serving as her official family-contact/nurse/assistant/entertainment/diet-coke-retriever/television-remote-operator. Luckily, she had her surgery at the Mayo Clinic here in Jacksonville which is like the Louis Vuitton of hospitals. We have been having a grand 'ole time together.

Of course spending this much time in any hospital will provide endless entertaining stories. So I'll start from the beginning. We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 yesterday morning, got her all checked in and then they took her away to get her prepped for surgery. Leaving me to entertain myself in the waiting room for the next 6.5 hours. I will say that Mayo is awesome at keeping you informed about what is going on with your patient, so I appreciated that. During the surgery, my husband was still in South America and my sister-in-law was at work, meaning that any important, immediate decisions would have to be made by me. Oh great. Why do people always entrust me with this much responsibility? I'm so special. I guess that is why I am always "nurse" Jacki for everyone in the family (including my bestie).

During my time in the waiting room, the other patient-caregiver/family-members provided some good quality people watching for me. Plus, they brought in a therapy dog for us to play with some of the time too. At one point, there was a family sitting across the waiting room from me that suddenly stood up yelling, "nurse! nurse!". One of their family members (not the patient waiting for surgery) had slumped over in his chair and gone unconscious. Chaos ensued in the waiting room and away he went on a stretcher to the ER. Things calmed down after that. About 2 hours later, unconscious dude was now awake and in a wheelchair. His family members wheeled him back into the waiting room and sat him in a chair, of course, right by me. Then his family members (all 3 of them) went off and left him there all alone. I have no idea where they went. So there he sat next to me by himself. Why on Earth would you leave your family member who had just recently gone unconscious for no reason all alone in a hospital waiting room? I was a nervous wreck. The entire time they were gone, I kept thinking about how this guy was probably going to pass out again and I was going to have to play good samaritan. Not that I'm not fully qualified to save his life with my CPR and First Aid certifications and all that, or that fact that we were in a hospital surrounded by nurses...I just feel like these weird situations always happen to me. So at one point this guy falls asleep in the chair next to me. For the next 30 minutes, I couldn't focus on anything except him. I kept watching him, making sure his chest was continuing to rise and fall, that his coloring looked good, that essentially I wasn't sitting next to a dead guy. Eventually, he woke up, the family returned and I could get back to reading my book. 

Finally, the surgery was over, Gina was out of recovery and up in her own room. And for the next two days, her and I entertained all the nurses on the 5th floor with our antics. In fact, when we checked out of the hospital today, the nurse taking us out to the car even said that she was sad that we were leaving. She said that she was going to miss us because we were so much fun. Well duh. Don't you know Gina and I? If it's not fun, we're not doing it. Glad we could leave our mark on the 5th floor of Mayo :)

Of course, being the "documentor" that I am I had to document all the fun we were having in room 549. Don't you wish that every hour you could push a little gray button and have instant cocktails shot into you? Obviously. The nurses were always cracking up because every time the hour was up and Gina could push the button again, her and I would yell out "time for happy hour!" We also enjoyed playing with her respirator machine and ordering lots of room service. Mayo is not your typical hospital. No yucky hospital food or green jello for us, we're having steak and Mahi! Not to mention an excessive amount of diet coke and chocolate ice cream. Plus, going for rides in the harness was always a good time. The nurses were especially entertained by the fact that Gina and I referred to said harness as her "50 Shades of Mayo". Needless to say there was never a dull moment on room 549 for the past two days. I am really glad that I had the opportunity to share in this experience with my mother-in-law. We got to share a lot of intimate moments and our relationship will never be the same...in a good way :) 

Slumber party in the 549 last night. I'll leave the contents of my CamelBak up to your imagination :)

Life Lately

Since I apparently have no time for blogging anymore, I guess we are just going to have to settle for these weekly "catch-up" posts. Sorry guys. Have no fear, once I am on summer vacation I will definitely have a lot more free time for blogging. Only 24 school days left, but who's counting? :)

I never shared with y'all the horrifying thing that showed up in the front office of my school one day...

Yes, that is a GIANT picture of my face. It should be illegal to blow up someone's yearbook photo that large. Since when does my school hang a "shrine" for the Teacher of the Year? Since now apparently. Great. If I would have known that my yearbook picture was going to be used for anything other than just a tiny little square on the faculty page in the yearbook, I might have actually put some effort into doing my hair that day. So until next school year, every person who walks in the front office of my school will be greeted by my smiling face everyday. Yippie. 

On Wednesday, I noticed that my elbow was kind of hurting when I moved it which was a little alarming since I never engage in any type of physical activity involving my arms. When I got home, I looked in the mirror and noticed this big red patch on my elbow. Weird. 

About 3 hours later, my elbow felt like it was on fire as my red patch had evolved into this...

I couldn't sleep all night because my elbow was burning so bad and I was losing range of motion in my arm. When I got up Thursday morning, I could hold my arm at a 90 degree angle and that was as far as it would move. My elbow was still bright red and burning. I went to work anyways and my students were pretty nice to me, keeping a good distance between us since they thought I was infected. That was the only benefit of all this pain. I left work early and went to the doctor who diagnosed me with cellulitis. Gross. He hooked me up with some prescription ointment and an antibiotic and off I went. Today, my elbow is already looking better and feeling a lot better. Thank you prescription drugs. 

It has been raining here everyday this week, which makes me want to crawl back in bed and read/watch a movie/sleep everyday. The only good thing about all this rain is that I get to prance around in my awesome rain boots. Yes, they have hunting dogs on them. I have had these rain boots since college and I love them. They better last forever since I paid a pretty penny for them, well actually my mom did. Typical J.Crew.

Thanks to all this rain, my students' field trip was cancelled today. Not cool. I was supposed to chill with my 20 assigned kids who were going to be left behind and watch movies all day. Unfortunately, this cancelled field trip meant that we went through our regular bell schedule and I had to see all my students today. However, I knew they were all pissed about missing the field trip so I wasn't about to try and get them to be productive. Alas, we continued on with movie day as planned. I also printed off some coloring pages to entertain us during the movie as well. Yes, sixth graders still like to color and it keeps them quiet. Double win. Of course, I wasn't going to let them have all the fun. I colored this picture for my co-worker in the classroom next door and she hung it on her bulletin board with all the students' artwork. Happy Friday. 

One of our family friends (she lived across the street from me as a kid and I used to babysit her when she was little) recently graduated from college and has embarked on quite the journey. Before joining the rest of us out here in the real world, she has decided to hike the entire Pacific Crest Trail. She is hiking 2700 miles from Mexico to Canada and she is documenting her entire journey on a blog. You can check out the blog here if you want to follow her on her journey. Also, do me a favor and pray for her safety over the next few months. 

Have a great weekend! 

Life Lessons from a Bird Dog

For those of your who are new to the blog and/or my life, allow me to introduce you to my bird dog, Sadie. She is a German Shorthair Pointer (aka: hunting dog) and she is quite the crazy adventurous little nugget. I realize that her adventurous bird dog tendencies are pretty standard since these dogs were bred for hunting in the field, not chillin' in a fenced-in backyard in suburbia. Jared and I got Sadie when we were in college about 6 years ago. Over the years, I have learned a lot from her (considering she can't talk to me) and I must say that she is a pretty wise little creature. Allow me to share some of her wisdom with you.

Here are some lessons that I have learned from Sadie that we can all apply to our everyday lives. Side note: I seriously considered writing this post from Sadie's point of view, but then I decided that would be super weird and probably confusing. Plus, I'm not really sure how to portray Sadie's voice in writing. I'm pretty sure that since she is always hyper and barking, the entire thing would need to be in all caps. So anyways, here are some lessons about life brought to you by my bird dog. Enjoy.

1. Live your life full speed ahead.
Most dogs spend their time outside frolicking leisurely in the yard, not Sadie. She treats our backyard like the track at Daytona International Speedway. I don't think I have ever seen Sadie lay down, or even sit, in our backyard. She is always on a mission, investigating and discovering every corner and crevasse of the yard. So instead of sitting on your butt being lazy, go out there and discover something new, even if it is in your own backyard.

2. Don't be afraid to charge though any obstacle that life throws at you.
When Sadie is out in the field hunting, she comes in contact with a lot of difficult obstacles that separate her from the birds. But no matter what, she always charges directly into the obstacle ready to over take it. So many times we try to go over or around the challenges we face to avoid them, and sometimes we even stop altogether. However, we are more likely to defeat the obstacles we fear if we charge directly at them and force our way through.

3. Protect the people (or things) that you love. 
I feel like Sadie should have her own "Protect this House" UnderArmour commercial. I don't think that anyone and I mean anyone makes it within 10 yards of our house without Sadie knowing about it, and doing something about it. Any time someone comes to our front door, they hear Sadie and take off. She is loud and proud. Whenever I'm home alone, she sticks to me like glue and follows me around. When I'm in the shower, she sits in the doorway of our bathroom and stands guard facing the front door. If someone she is not familiar with is close to me (especially touching me), she freaks out. I guarantee that Sadie would sacrifice herself and put herself in harms way 100% of the time to protect me. How many people are you willing to do that for?

4. Create your own "no fly" zone.
Don't allow bad people, fears or temptations into your safe environment and if they try to make their way in, get rid of them as soon as possible. We refer to my backyard as a "no fly" zone thanks to Sadie. Not a single living creature dares to enter our backyard or even attempts to fly over it. Any animals that have ever come into our backyard while Sadie was outside, never made it back to the other side of that fence. Sadie rules that backyard and does not let any unwanted visitors get past her guard. In life, there are so many unwanted people, fears, negativity or temptations that try to make their way into our lives. But like Sadie, we have to stand guard and not let any of these bad things enter our "no fly" zone.

5. The challenge is what makes life worth living.
You might think that being a dog does not come with its own set of challenges, well being a hunting dog is different. Bird dogs don't just lay around the house doing nothing, they have a craft that they are very serious about. Sadie is passionate about hunting and will do absolutely whatever it takes to to perfect her craft. She endures all types of terrain, weather and injuries without ever giving up on finding, pointing and retrieving those birds. So instead of whining and complaining when things get tough, take on those challenges with that same drive and determination as Sadie does. I'm going to borrow a quote from Tom Hanks for this one..."It's supposed to be hard! If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard...is what makes it great!" Thank you A League of Their Own for that little mantra.

6. Nothing in life is more satisfying than companionship. 
At the end of the day, love and companionship are the only things that will get us through this life. Dogs exemplify this greatly. All they want is companionship from their owners. They don't need anything else. No matter how many times I yell at Sadie or want to beat her behind for puking on the carpet, she never holds it against me. I can punish her for doing something bad and 2 minutes later, she still wants to snuggle with me. No one gives unconditional love like dogs do. No matter how many times you let them down, they still love you. Just think about that the next time you are unwilling to forgive someone.

7. Don't do drugs. (This one is really a joke...but seriously)
One time Sadie ate a mushroom from the backyard when we were in college. She started acting crazy and getting really sick. We had to take her to the emergency vet. She obviously survived, but was a little out of whack for a while afterwards. Moral of the story...don't eat shrooms. Drugs are bad for you, kids. Consider this your public service announcement for the week.

Those are just a few valuable life lessons we can learn from old, wise Sadie. Bet you never knew you could learn so much from a hunting dog, did you?

In closing, here is a picture of me with Sadie when she was a puppy...because everyone likes to look at pictures of cute puppies. Oh goodie, and it's a blonde hair Jacki flashback too.

FSU vs. UF

This past Saturday, November 24th, was the much-anticipated annual rivalry game between Florida State and Florida. Since the game was in Tallahassee this year, we attended the showdown in Doak Campbell Stadium which one of the radio announcers referred to as the "House of Horrors" after the game. We lost. Miserably.

However, that doesn't mean I didn't have a good time. The atmosphere in the sold out stadium was amazing, up until about half way through the 4th quarter when all hope was lost and it was 100% certain that we were definitely going to lose the game.

I was mostly excited about getting to see our friends for one last home game this season and getting to actually wear a sweater to a game. Usually, football games in Tallahassee are in the 90 degree heat, even in November, but for once it was a little chilly. Real football weather. And so the tailgating commenced...

Welcome to our tailgate! Yes, my husband and his fraternity brothers have their own banner.

As Seminole Boosters, we get a parking spot for the season. Ours is in a parking garage, so we always set up our tailgate on the top deck of the parking garage. That way we get to be outside and have a great view overlooking campus. Sometimes it gets a little windy up there, but we always tie down our tents so it has never been a problem before.

Apparently, the football gods were not on our side on Saturday. I feel like our tailgating experience was some foreshadowing as to what was going to happen later in the game. In the midst of our tailgating festivities, this happened...

The wind caught our tents and sent them tumbling over the side of the 4 story parking garage. Luckily, we tied them to the parking garage so they just hung there over the side, suspended in the air. No one was injured or hit with the tents flying through the air, but it was especially difficult to get them back over the side of the garage. Eventually we were able rescue the tents; however, both of them were broken in the process. I should have known that this was a bad omen for the football game.

After the tent fiasco, we went about our regular tailgating activities. My husband played tailgate chef and prepared some delicious treats for all of us to enjoy. The main dish on the menu was of course deep fried gator tail in honor of our opponents :)

We had to use our little electric fryer, instead of our normal fryer because we aren't allowed to bring propane tanks up in the parking garage due to fire hazard. This was probably a good thing seeing as how lucky we had been thus far that day. Some of the UF fans from the tailgate next to us kept coming over and eating our gator too because they liked it so much. Ironic? I found it pretty entertaining.

Soon it was time to pack up the tailgate and head to the bloodbath game. Although we lost the game, I still enjoyed the festivities that surround the FSU vs. UF tradition. There's nothing like a good state rivalry.

FSU plays again on Saturday in the ACC Championship so I am hoping that we can be victorious over Georgia Tech and get to go to a good Bowl Game. Either way, I never give up on my 'Noles even when they break my heart. Football season is almost over so we better enjoy it while we can. Go Noles!

Two Beers and a Mayonnaise Jar

You may have seen this post on Facebook, but one of my friends emailed it to me and I liked it so I decided to share. I think it gives a pretty interesting perspective on life and I have been working really hard lately at letting go of the small stuff and appreciating all the blessings I do have, so I think this applies to my life currently...

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.

The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full..

The students responded with a unanimous "yes".

The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed...

"Now", said the professor as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life".

The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls."

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children.

Spend time with your parents.

Visit with grandparents.

Take your spouse out to dinner.

Play another 18.

There will always be time to clean the house and mow the lawn.

Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter.

Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled and said, "I'm glad you asked."

The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers with a friend.

Goodbye Summer

Well, it's back to work for me today. Summer is officially over and a new school year is upon us. My students don't start until next Monday, but teachers return today for pre-planning. Although I am sad that summer is gone already, I am excited to get my classroom all pretty and decorated for another school year. Pictures will be coming soon of course :)

Teacher Humor

I apologize for being MIA for the majority of this week, but I am currently working on getting my classroom all decorated and ready for the upcoming year. Pre-planning starts next week, but somehow tons of new teachers end up getting sent to me every year for help so I lose the majority of my pre-planning time working with them. I absolutely love mentoring new teachers so this doesn't bother me at all, I just want to make sure my classroom is ready in time. Pictures coming soon :)

While I am busy working in my classroom today, please enjoy this little "teacher appreciation" video brought to us by Jimmy Kimmel...

 

Of course this isn't how teachers really feel about our students :) Best wishes on this upcoming school year to all my fellow teachers!

Men and Cocktails

Have you ever noticed that you can tell a lot about a man by the type of cocktail he chooses to drink? Back when I was single and in college, my best friend and I would totally judge every man in the bar by what he was drinking. If a guy came up to us to flirt, the drink in his hand was usually the determining factor as to whether we were going to be polite and at least cordial enough to say hello or if we were going to laugh in his face and walk away.

Say a guy approaches with a beer in his hand, he at least deserves a polite hello. If he's holding a whiskey, even better. That guy would probably get a full conversation out of us. If we're at a nice bar and he's holding a scotch, we're probably already planning out our wedding vows. On the other hand, if he's holding anything brightly colored or mixed with vodka, he should expect to be laughed at, made fun of and told to go f**k off.

The inspiration for this blog post comes from the book I'm reading, "50 Shades of Grey". I simply can't get over the fact that the author of this book has made Christian Grey's signature cocktail white wine. What a horrendous choice for his character. What kind of man drinks white wine? I'll tell you what kind...a sissy one. White wine is by far the last thing I would ever expect a character like Christian Grey to be drinking. Even red wine would have been a much more acceptable choice. I could also see him drinking like a dirty martini or something; however, the best choice would obviously have been scotch. Perfect example for those of you who watch Gossip Girl...Chuck Bass drinks scotch, need I say more?

Thus leading me to my main point here. What a man's cocktail tells you about him...

White wine - I'm either holding this for my girlfriend while she's in the bathroom or I'm not a real man.

Vodka - same a white wine...or I like to pretend that I'm staring in a rap video being filmed in South Beach

Dirty Martini - the only acceptable reason for a man to drink out of a martini glass simply because James Bond drinks one

Rum - I'm either still in high school or going to a Jimmy Buffett concert

Margarita - only acceptable at Mexican restaurants or on Cinco de Mayo

Beer - I'm planning on drinking for many hours today and I've adopted the mentality that drinking is a marathon not a sprint. I'm taking it easy tonight, I don't feel like blowing a bunch of money, or I'm the designated driver.

Whiskey - I'm a real man's man. They write country music songs about guys like me.

Scotch - the cocktail that screams money, power and class

So next time you head out to the bar, be sure you keep this advice in mind when choosing a man to waste your time on. Trust me, that guy with the vodka cranberry does not know how to do squat. I promise you he won't be able to satisfy your spider-killing/flat-tire-changing/toilet-unclogging needs...or any of your other needs for that matter. Oh my, that was inappropriate...my bad :)

Pick Me Up

Yes, that's right, it's only Thursday. If this week feels like it is just dragging on and on with no end in sight, and you are in need of a little pick me up, I have just the thing for you...

I'm pretty sure that I've mentioned before on this blog that I was in a sorority in college, Phi Mu, and that I'm overly obsessed with it. One of the best things about living in a sorority house is that there is never a dull moment and funny things happen all the time...having a dance party in the hallway is a pretty normal occurrence. Therefore, the contents of the video below is basically what living in the Phi Mu house was like everyday. We just never put it on YouTube, but I'm glad someone finally did because now I can watch it and reminis about bygone days in the Phi Mu house at Florida State. I must mention that two of the girls in this video were actually initiated by me when I was President of the chapter and I couldn't be prouder :)

I could literally watch this over and over again and it never fails to make me laugh. The first time I watched it, I couldn't help but thinking, "I wonder if Pamela (the house mom) knows that girl is hula-hooping on the dining room table?" Plus, I love the cameo made by Sir Fidel, our sorority mascot. If you were in a sorority in college, you can probably appreciate this video a lot and if you weren't, then here is what you missed out on :) Either way, if you are feeling down and out, please enjoy this silly video...guaranteed to put a smile on your face.



I hope that gave you the little burst of energy you need to make it through the rest of this week. Fear not, the weekend is almost here!

Hall Pass

I know that there are a lot of girlfriends/wives out there who hardly ever let their men out of their sight. However, every now and then they reward their guy with what has been recently coined as a "hall pass", which is essentially a boys night out. I pretty much let my husband go hang out with his friends whenever he wants to because #1: who am I to tell him what he is and is not allowed to do...he's an adult and it's not like I'm his parole officer or something. And #2: I genuinely enjoy spending time by myself. I have never been a needy or dependent type of girl. I really do like being alone. A night out with the boys for him = wine, chick flicks, painting my nails and browsing Pinterest without feeling guilty about ignoring him. Saturday morning golf/hunting/fishing outings (depending on the season) are my favorite time to catch up on my blogging or reading while working on my tan. Now I'm not going to lie, do I occasionally get pissed about him leaving me at home alone, yes. However, that doesn't occur very often and it usually has something to do with the dogs annoying me to death while I'm trying to enjoy my peace and quiet.

I know that you will all probably hate me for saying this, but you need to give your man a break. Dealing with women is a pain and I'm sure they get sick of trying to please us 24/7...so let them go out and have some testosterone-induced fun. Trust me, I don't even like dealing with women for long periods of time, and I understand us, so I can only imagine how they must feel. Are my feelings about boys night out all going to change once we have kids? Probably. But until then, I'll let him enjoy it.

I found this on the internet and thought that it was too funny not to share. This one is for all girlfriends/wives out there who are not as big a fan of boys night out as I am...

Maybe this weekend you should try giving your man a hall pass. I bet he would appreciate it :)

Some E-Cards

Am I the only person who is continuously entertained by someecards? For some reason, I find them delightfully hilarious and whenever I'm having a bad day, one always seems to pop up on Pinterest or Facebook. They never fail to put me in a good mood. Hope these brighten your day :)

                                                                                                    Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                  Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                 Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                      Source: Uploaded by user via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                      Source: Uploaded by user via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                     Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                           Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                         Source: tumblr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                     Source: 28.media.tumblr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                         Source: tumblr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                          Source: someecards.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Monday Humor

Congratulations, you survived another Monday! Not to mention, the Monday after daylight savings. That is always a tough one. I think that Mondays are a particularly important time for some humor in our lives. So rather than dwelling on how far away the weekend is (or Spring Break in my case), please enjoy the humorous poster I found on Pinterest today. It is well worth the read, I promise.

This is kind of long, but so true and absolutely hysterical. Enjoy :)

                                                                                                             Source: stumbleupon.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Hope you have a wonderful rest of the week!

Valentine's Day

For everyone else, today is Valentine's Day, but for me it's just another Tuesday. If you know me well, you know that I am the least romantic person ever. Therefore, anything that has to do with that mushy lovey dovey romantic crap does not make the cut. I know that people really hate those who are cynical and bitter on Valentine's Day, but I'm not saying that everyone else has to hate Valentine's Day just because I don't like it. I just choose not to really celebrate it because I just don't care and I'd rather my husband spend the money on something else. Don't get me wrong, I love to decorate for every holiday, but when it actually comes to celebrating it, I'm not the biggest fan of Valentine's Day. However, if you like all that romantic stuff and you love to celebrate Valentine's Day, then I hope you are having an amazing Valentine's Day this year!

One reason why I dislike Valentine's Day is because I am a teacher. For elementary school teachers, I'm sure Valentine's Day is adorable and fun, but for middle and high school teachers it is a nightmare. The kids act crazy. They are all hopped up on sugar and causing all kinds of drama, like..."my boyfriend bought me a bigger teddy bear than your boyfriend did!" and kids bringing cupcakes and all kinds of nonsense that they want to pass out during class. Not to mention, some of my students don't have the money to spend on some big display of affection for their flavor of the week girlfriend. So much drama. Plus, they think since it is Valentine's Day that all those rules I have about not eating in class and such just magically don't apply on this day. Additionally, they get all mad a me about making them do work because they want pretend like it's elementary school and just have parties all day. Seriously annoying. Needless to say, I'll be celebrating tonight with a big glass of wine.

I'm sure people think I'm crazy for not liking Valentine's Day since I'm married. Yes, I have a guaranteed Valentine every year, but it still isn't that important to me. I don't like romantic stuff, I hate chocolate and all desserts and I don't really get excited about getting flowers, especially roses. I know that some girls love getting flowers, but this is what flowers say in my mind..."just to show you how much I love you, here are some flowers that are going to die in 5 days." Speaking of flowers, this brings me to a funny Valentine's Day story about my husband...

When Jared and I were in college, I expressed my dislike for Valentine's Day but he still wanted to do something for me. I think he was afraid that I would tell him that I didn't want a gift, not really mean it, and then get all pissed off when he didn't get me a gift. He eventually figured out that I'm not one of those crazy girls who thinks that men can read her mind, but instead that whatever I say is what I actually want him to do. Anyways, so we were having a random conversation about roses and how I think that it is so ridiculous for someone to spend $50 on roses on Valentine's Day when the roses are just going to die anyway. So I made a comment to the effect of..."I would rather just get the 50 bucks than the stupid roses". Well, that conversation ended and we went on with our day. A couple days later it was Valentine's Day and I was happy that he got the memo because there wasn't an embarrassing display of roses awaiting me. Instead, he gave me a Valentine's Day card with the check for $50 inside. It was the best Valentine's Day gift ever. I took that $50 and bought a pair of shoes that I'd has my eye on with it. And guess what...I'm sure your roses from that Valentine's Day are rotting in the ground somewhere but those stilettos are still in my closet :)

So whether you are doing anything special or not for this Valentine's Day, I hope you enjoy your day!

Persistence

I have finally joined the rest of the universe and got an iPhone. It was a difficult process...as is everything I try to do, but I finally have it and I am in love. Introducing my new phone...ta da

Of course anytime that I have to deal with a customer service representative, there is always a humorous story to follow. I acquired my knack for dealing with idiots from my mother. I used to get embarrassed and think she was crazy when I was a kid and she would put idiotic people in their place. Now, I totally understand why she does what she does. People are so irritating.

Let's start from the beginning...I pre-ordered my phone on the first day it was available for pre-order which was October 7th. Well 3 weeks later, I still didn't have my phone..surprise, surprise. Jared's phone arrived a few days before mine did so I had already seen how the process worked. You can track your order online and it will show you when it is delivered to the store. Obviously, I was constantly checking online to see if my phone had shipped yet.

On Thursday afternoon, I checked online and it said that my phone had shipped and would be delivered no later than 3pm on Friday. I was ecstatic!

I got off work on Friday around 3 and headed over to the AT&T store. I tried to check my order status on my phone to make sure that it was delivered, but since my old phone only had super ghetto internet I couldn't look at it. I decided to call the store to check. Some bitchy girl answered the phone and did not seem too excited about assisting me with my problem. She put me on hold while she went to look for my phone in the stock room and ended up telling me that my phone had not arrived yet. I decided that I didn't trust that stupid girl so I was going to go to the store anyways and see for myself.

Upon arriving at the store, I realized that I had asked the girl on the phone to look for a phone under my name when the account is actually in my mom's name. Maybe that's why she didn't find the phone initially. I talk to another delightful individual who's job is to check you in when you arrive at the store. I tell her the story and she immediately tells me that they have not had any deliveries today. I ask her to please go check anyway. She gives me an attitude, but goes and looks for me. She and her attitude return and assure me that my phone is not there. Now I'm really pissed because the website said that it would be there on Friday and I had already got myself all excited about it. Grrr

I go out to my car and decide that I'm not giving up yet because I still think that both of those girls in the store are idiots. I call my bestie, Casey, to enlist her assistance is bringing down the stupidity inside AT&T. I have her log into my account online to check the status of my phone. And what do you know, my phone was delivered and signed for at 12:49 that afternoon by the AT&T store...well, isn't that convenient. So now what do I do? I have already had 2 different people tell me that the phone wasn't there, but the computer says that it is. I'm pretty sure that the people in the store already think I'm crazy, but I really want my phone...now.

I don't want to go back into the store and cause a scene without any validation that I am correct, so I call the store from my car and pray that I get to talk to someone other than the 2 girls I've already dealt with. A man answers the phone and I tell him that the online order status says that my phone was delivered to the store and so I just wanted to call and make sure it was there :) About 2 minutes later, he comes back on the line and says that my phone is there whenever I would like to come pick it up. Well how about that.

Now, I have to go back into the store and face the 2 girls that already think I'm crazy and give them a piece of my mind. Back inside the store, Miss Bad Attitude #1 that signs people in gives me the stink eye when I walk through the door. She says, "is there something ELSE I can help you with?" I tell her that I actually just spoke with a gentleman from this store and he told me that my phone is indeed here, so I would like to get it now please. She scowls at me and puts my name on the little sign in sheet.

After waiting for about 10 minutes, one of the service representatives calls my name. And wouldn't you know it...it's Miss Bad Attitude #2 who was so pleasant to me on the phone the first time I called. She gets real snippy and tells me, "I already told you that your phone is not here". So I said, "well the gentleman I spoke to on the phone 15 minutes ago seems to think otherwise, so maybe you should go check again." A few minutes later, she emerges from the back with a box in hand. She should have quit while she was ahead, but she has the audacity to say, "well this wasn't back there when I checked the first time". So of course I have to throw in, "actually it probably was since it's been back there since it was delivered at 12:49 this afternoon. She looks at me with a pissed off face and doesn't say anything.

As I walk out of the AT&T store with my new phone, I get a text message from AT&T. It's a survey asking me to rate my recent experience with their service representatives. Well I'd be happy too of course...I'd be just delighted to include the names of the ladies I spoke with at the store as well as how rude and difficult they made my Friday afternoon. Perhaps their store manager will give them the attitude adjustment they need :)

Thankfully, my persistence paid off and I have been enjoying my new phone ever since!