Bumpdate {34 Weeks}

I might be the happiest pregnant lady on the block right now. I have no idea why, but I am just loving my pregnancy currently. Aside from my swollen feet and all my joints aching nonstop, I feel awesome. I think I'm starting to get a little nostalgic about my pregnancy coming to an end. Despite some mild unpleasantries, this whole pregnancy experience really has been wonderful and I think I will miss it once it is over. A few weeks from now I'll probably be singing a different tune, but for now I'm going to enjoy what is left of my pregnancy glow.

Week 34: April 23 - April 29

Week 34 Milestones: 

- Baby is the size of a cantaloupe this week! She's working on packing on the pounds and maturing her lungs in preparation for delivery. She can also hear voices really well at this point and recognize songs. It is said that simple songs that are sang to her in the womb from this point on can be recalled even after she is born and will soothe her. Pretty cool!

- Total pregnancy weight gain is holding on at 37 pounds this week. I think that my belly is starting to drop as well. Take a look at this week's photo in comparison to the previous weeks and see if you agree. My belly button is still in...well technically it's flat, but not poking out yet!

- My feet are still swollen 24/7 and my hands become swollen on occasion. I have random spurts of carpal tunnel pain in my right wrist, but it's not too bad. I also notice that if I sit in one position for too long, my hips are really sore and tight when I go to stand up. Other than that, I have been pretty lucky at avoiding some of the really terrible third trimester symptoms that some of my other fellow pregos have been experiencing lately. Hang in there girls!

- Braxton Hicks contractions are still a normal part of my day, mostly hitting me when I am doing a lot of walking or at night. Sometimes they wake me up in the middle of the night, which is kind of annoying, but I just have to change positions and then they go away. I must change sleep positions a thousand times during the night. Thank goodness for king-sized beds.

- Peyton loves when Jared touches my belly. If I feel her moving, I'll put my hands on my belly, but that usually makes her stop. I guess she doesn't want to put on a show for mommy. However, I can be feeling no movement at all and as soon as Jared puts his hands on my belly, she starts kicking like crazy. How can she tell the difference between the touch of different people? Craziness. I guess she is just a daddy's girl already. No surprise there.

- Food preferences: Still enjoying salads, raw fruits and veggies the most. In addition to my daily waffles and occasional coke icees, of course.

Mommy and I went to her condo in New Smyrna Beach for the weekend. Still rocking my bikini on the beach and showing off the bump.

I was rather amused by how silly/cool my shadow looks right now with my giant belly. 

Jared's great aunt makes traditional quilts by hand and I was so excited when she told us that she was going to make one for Peyton. It arrived in the mail today and I am so in love with it. It even has a monogram and a little quatrefoil on it!

She also sewed this little note onto the back of the quilt from her to Peyton. So special. 

100 Happy Days

I have decided to embark on this little challenge, to find something in my life that makes me happy every single day for 100 days in a row. I've seen this project on Facebook and Instagram and I really like the concept behind it so I'm going to jump on the bandwagon. I feel like too often we dwell on the things in our life that are negative or not living up to our expectations, when in reality, we are surrounded by 10x the amount of positive things that we can be thankful for which far outweigh that one bad thing. I am so guilty of this and I know it, which is why I really want to complete this challenge. I want to remind myself everyday of all the wonderful things in my life that I have to be happy about. Whether they be big or small, important or insignificant, if it makes me happy I want to take the time to recognize it.

I am starting today. I'll be posting a photo on Instagram with the hashtag #100happydays every day for the next 100 days. I'll probably post the photos in groups here on the blog occasionally as well so y'all can follow along.

If you are interested in participating with me, just go to their website 100happydays.com and sign up. Yes, you actually register for this and then they check up on you to make sure that you are actually keeping up with it!

Join me in appreciating the little things in your life that can make you happy every single day! Here goes nothing. Wish me luck. Here's to the next 100 days, full of happiness!

National Infertility Awareness Week

In America alone, one in eight couples will have trouble getting pregnant this year. Around 7.3 million women will struggle with infertility at some point in their life. You know these women. They could be your friends, your family, your co-workers or the the woman in line behind you at the grocery store. You are surrounded by these women everyday whether you know it or not. I am one of these women. Infertility is often brushed under the rug as a "private matter"; not something we need to bring to public attention. It is often regarded as something you aren't supposed to talk about or something you should be ashamed of. However, it is far to common now for us to simply go on pretending that it doesn't exist or that it doesn't affect every single one of us in some way.

Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive or carry a pregnancy to term after 12 months of trying to conceive. For some of us, we are able to overcome infertility with the help of medications or treatments such as IVF. However, that does not mean that our hope for future pregnancies won't be affected by infertility as well. In addition, women who have already had one of more successful pregnancies can also be affected by infertility at any time. No matter what the circumstance, infertility is scary and frustrating. For me, not knowing what was going on in my body or what to do about it was the most difficult part. All our lives, we are taught over and over again how to prevent getting pregnant, or what to do once we are pregnant. No one ever tells you what to do if you can't get pregnant, or prepares you for the possibility that you won't get pregnant like everyone else does. Everyone assumes that getting pregnant is easy and natural and that everyone can do it. Unfortunately, that is not the case.

Please take some time this week to educate yourself about infertility. Whether you already have your own children or not, someone you know is probably being affected by infertility and they might need your support. If you have never tried to conceive before, but you plan on having kids one day, I urge you to get informed. I pray that you will never experience infertility, but in the event that you do, I don't want you to be blind-sided like I was.

This website has a lot of good information about infertility awareness. Take a moment this week to tell the people you know who are suffering with infertility that you care. I understand that sometimes we don't always know what is really going on in people's lives, so I find it a best practice to not bring up the subject unless they volunteer the information first. I kept my infertility a secret for 18 months and I can't tell you how many people would come up to me on a regular basis and ask me about when we were going to start having kids. Obviously, they had no clue what we were going through or I'm sure they never would have brought it up, but that still didn't make it any less painful for me. So before you ask someone you know when they are planning on starting a family or adding to their family, stop and think before you bring it up.

If you know someone who has been open with you about their infertility, but you are unsure of how to best support them or what to say to them, I hope you find the article below helpful. I wanted to share this article because I literally had every single thing on the "not to say" list said to me during my fertility treatments and I know that it can be a very awkward and difficult situation to be in regardless of what side you are on.

25 Things To Say (and Not To Say) to Someone Living with Infertility

To Say:
1. Let them know that you care. The best thing you can do is let your infertile friends know that you care.
2. Do your research. Read up about infertility, and possibly treatments or other family building options your friend is considering, so that you are informed when your friend needs to talk.
3. Act interested. Some people don’t want to talk about infertility, but some do. Let them know you’re available if they want to talk.
4. Ask them what they need. They may also appreciate if you ask them what the most helpful things to say are.
5. Provide extra outreach to your male friends. Infertility is not a woman’s-centric issue; your male friends are most likely grieving silently. Don’t push, but let them know you’re available.
6. When appropriate, encourage therapy. If you feel your friend could benefit from talking to a professional to handle his or her grief, suggest therapy gently. If you go to therapy regularly, or ever have, share your personal story.
7. Support their decision to stop treatment. No couple can endure infertility treatments forever. At some point, they will stop. This is an agonizing decision to make, and it involves even more grief. 
8. Remember them on Mother's and Father’s Day. With all of the activity on Mother's Day and Father’s Day, people tend to forget about those who cannot become mothers and fathers. Remember your infertile friends on these days; they will appreciate knowing that you haven't forgotten them.
9. Attend difficult appointments with them. You can offer to stay in the waiting room or come into the appointment with them. But the offer lets them know how committed you are to supporting them. 
10. Watch their older kids. Attending appointments may be difficult if they have older kids at home.
11. Offer to be an exercise buddy. Sometimes losing weight is necessary to make treatments more effective. If you know they are trying to lose weight, you could offer to join them because it would help you achieve your personal fitness goals as well. 
12. Let them know about your pregnancy. But deliver the news in a way that lets them handle their initial reaction privately – email is best.

Not To Say:
1. Don't tell them to relax. Comments such as "just relax" create even more stress for the infertile couple, particularly the woman. The woman feels like she is doing something wrong when, in fact, there is a good chance that there is a physical problem preventing her from becoming pregnant.
2. Don't minimize the problem. Failure to conceive a baby is a very painful journey. Comments like, "Just enjoy being able to sleep late . . . .travel . . etc.," do not offer comfort. Instead, these comments make infertile people feel like you are minimizing their pain. 
3. Don't say there are worse things that could happen. Who is the final authority on what is the "worst" thing that could happen to someone? Different people react to different life experiences in different ways.
4. Don't say they are not meant to be parents. “One of the cruelest things anyone ever said to me is, ‘Maybe God doesn't intend for you to be a mother.’” Infertility is a medical condition, not a punishment from God or Mother Nature.
5. Don't ask why they are not trying IVF. Because most insurance plans do not cover IVF treatment, many are unable to pay for the out-of-pocket expenses. Infertility stress is physical, emotional, and financial.
6. Don't push adoption or another solution. So often infertile couples are asked, “Why don’t you just adopt?” The couple needs to work through many issues before they will be ready to make an adoption decision or chose another family building option.
7. Don’t say, “You’re young, you have plenty of time to get pregnant.” Know the facts. It’s recommended that women under 35 see a fertility specialist after being unable to conceive for one year. Being young increases your chance of fertility treatments working, but it does not guarantee success.
8. Don't gossip about your friend's condition. For some, infertility treatments are a very private matter, which is why you should respect your friend’s privacy. 
9. Don't be crude. Don't make crude jokes about your friend's vulnerable position. Crude comments like, "I'll donate the sperm" or "Make sure the doctor uses your sperm for the insemination" are not funny, and they only irritate your friends.
10. Don't complain about your pregnancy. For many facing infertility, it can be hard to be around other women who are pregnant. Seeing your belly grow is a constant reminder of what your infertile friend cannot have. Not complaining can make things a little easier for your friend. 
11. Don’t question their sadness about being unable to conceive a second child. Having one child does not mean a couple feels they have completed their family. Also, a couple may have had their first child naturally and easily but are now experiencing secondary infertility - infertility that comes after you’ve already had a child. 
12. Don’t ask whose “fault” it is. Male or female factor. Just because a friend has told you he or she is experiencing infertility as a couple, does not mean he or she wants to discuss the details.
13. On the other hand, don’t assume the infertility is female factor. 1/3 of infertility is female factor, 1/3 is male factor, and 1/3 is unexplained.

(Article Source)

If you or someone you know if struggling with infertility, encourage that person to read blogs from other women who are going through the same thing. I found this extremely helpful, knowing that I was not the only one out there who was struggling and that it's ok to be scared and pissed off. I documented my entire infertility journey on my blog, so please share it with anyone who you think might find it helpful. This link will get you to all my posts about our journey. 

I am sending my love, prayers and a virtual hug to everyone out there who is currently struggling with infertility. You are not alone.

Bumpdate {33 Weeks}

I write to you today with a heavy heart. My family lost a very dear friend yesterday. I grew up alongside his children, and his wife has been one of my mom's best friends since they were in high school together. Their family is more like an extension of my own family, rather than simply just friends. Of course, I am deeply saddened that I cannot be with the family this week to attend the funeral services. However, they live in Chattanooga, Tennessee and I am way too pregnant that my doctor won't allow me to travel that far away from home. I send my love and prayers to their family from afar, and part of me is filled with joy knowing that my dad and his friend are together again in our Lord's Kingdom.

God works in mysterious ways. I was reminded yesterday that although the Lord does take cherished lives away from us here on Earth, he also blesses us with new ones. Not only did my family lose a very special man, but we gained a new baby boy all in the same day. My best friend, Casey, delivered a happy and healthy baby boy, James Thomas, last night. Mom and baby are both doing great and I can't wait to meet this little dude!

I've said it before here on the blog and I'll say it again...tell your family and friends that you love them and don't take them for granted because tomorrow isn't guaranteed for anyone.

Week 33: April 16 - April 22

Week 33 Milestones:

- I realize that I probably should have put something about Easter on the chalkboard this week, but I totally forgot that Easter was actually occurring during this week until after I had already taken this picture earlier in the week. Fail. Let's just blame the pregnancy brain.

- I must officially be in mommy mode now because I literally could have cared less that my own birthday occurred this week. I was more concerned with getting things ready for Peyton and going to the doctor to find out how she is doing. I didn't even write a blog post about my birthday this year. Hey, I'm turning 27, I'm large and 33 weeks pregnant, I can't drink or do much of anything else exciting. So what's there to write about? Peyton's impending arrival is much more exciting to me right now, so sorry birthday, maybe next year.

- Baby is the size of a durian fruit this week? Is that even a real thing? I feel like there has got to be a better food comparison out there than that, but hey we can all Google what the heck a durian fruit is and learn something new today! Baby now keeps her eyes open all the time whenever she is awake. I kind of feel bad for her because having nothing to look at inside my uterus all day must get boring. Her skeleton is hardening, except for her skull which will stay separated into smaller plates until after birth so that her head will fit through the birth canal. That's a terrifying visual.

- My total weight gain thus far has reached 37 pounds. Aside from my giant basketball belly and my swollen feet, I don't really think I look that humongous. Thankfully, I have a full 5 feet 10 inches of height working to my advantage here in dispersing all of this weight. And the belly button is still in, hooray!

- She is officially taking up every square inch of available space inside my belly. My doctor gave me a surprise ultrasound at our appointment on Thursday because it was my birthday. It was mildly disappointing. She is so jam packed in there that you can't really see anything at all. We kind of got to see her smushed face for a second and then the only other thing we could actually see at all was her butt.

- We currently sleep with the air conditioning on 68 degrees at night and I still wake up sweating. My body temperature is so warm now that we have to keep the air conditioning cranked down all the time. Jared loves it because usually he is the one that's hot, but recently he says that he feels like Steve Martin in Father of the Bride Part 2 when the wife and daughter are laying on the couch sweating and Steve Martin is running around in a parka freezing to death. Sorry, but my body is busy baking a human being in there so it's gets a little warm.

- All of those pregnancy symptoms that you hear about before you actually get pregnant are only about 1/4 of the actual symptoms that you will experience. Literally every single part of your body is affected by your pregnancy and the most random things that you would never expect to be associated with pregnancy happen. Darn hormones.

- Warning: this gets a little graphic. Don't say I didn't warn you. Two freaky and not so pleasant sensations that I have had the joy of experiencing recently involve her really getting herself into the down and ready position for delivery. The instructor in our child birth class showed us how the pelvis (yes, like the actual bone structure) will expand to make space for the baby to get into position to descend through the birth canal. Do you know what it's like to feel your own pelvis actually expanding? Yeah, it's a new one for me too and man is it freaky feeling. So occasionally when I'm up walking around, I can feel my pelvis expanding. It's just weird. On an even more delightful note, I sometimes also feel her headbutting me in the pelvis/cervix (sorry guys, I know, over-share) which makes it feel like she is going to fall out. Let's just say I was a tad bit on the panicked side when that happened for the first time. I literally said to her, "oh no, stay in there, it's not time to come out yet!" My doctor reassured me that she is well secured in there and is not going to fall out just yet. Sometimes I wonder what is must be like to be an OBGYN and have people come in your office all day saying ridiculous things; you must get a lot of good laughs. My doctor and his wife are both OBs and I can just imagine what their dinner conversation must be like every evening. I know he definitely gets some good laughs out of me and my insane questions, but hey, I've never had a baby before so I don't know what the heck is supposed to be going on, that's what I pay him the big bucks for.

- Fun fact of the day...did you know that carpal tunnel is like an actual tunnel/canal in your wrist? I always knew that it was a syndrome, but I guess I never thought about the fact that it's also a structural piece of your body. So I have been waking up every morning with achiness, numbness and pain my fingers and wrist and I couldn't figure out why. I literally wake up feeling like I'm 100 years old. Apparently, this is yet another one of those pregnancy symptoms that no one tells you about. Just like how my feet are retaining fluid and swelling, the same thing is happening in my hands. And in my right wrist in particular, my carpal tunnel is retaining fluid which causes pressure on the nerves that run through this tunnel, alas the weird pains that I keep having in my wrist when I move it in certain ways.

- Food preferences: Aside from my indulgences of waffles and coke icees, I basically eat like a bunny all day. I'm really into green apples, salads and raw veggies like carrots, cucumbers, green peppers, etc. I will admit that I have been enjoying an excessive amount of Hershey's chocolate eggs this week as well. I have no idea why, but when a Hershey's kiss is shaped like a tiny Easter egg and wrapped in pretty pastel foil, it just tastes better for some reason.

Happy Easter from the Roche family...and my giant Easter egg belly!

Congratulations to my best friend, Casey, on this adorable little nugget born yesterday!

Book Club

In the sixth grade, I had to read The Giver for summer reading. Yes, I was the kid who actually did the required summer reading every year and really did read all of the books in their entirety, not just the SparkNotes. What can I say, I absolutely love to read and I will give any book a fair chance. I secretly loved summer reading because I discovered some of my favorite books that way and I actually enjoyed many of the books that were assigned to us. I'll admit, some of them were terrible and painful to get through, but I'm sure that I am a better, more well-rounded reader because of them. Then again, I'm an English major and literature nerd so I enjoy reading all kinds of stuff that normal people hate.

Back to The Giver...the summer before sixth grade, we had to read this book and it quickly became one of my favorite books ever. The whole concept of a dystopian society and the psychological impact that this type of environment has on human beings seriously fascinated me for some reason. I've never really enjoyed Science Fiction, but I was even more enticed by the genre when we had to read Anthem by Ayn Rand two years later. The dystopian theme has really been the only type of Science Fiction that I have ever enjoyed, and both of these books have remained favorites of mine to this day. I think that I am most impressed by this sub-genre because of the author's ability to create an intricately designed fictitious world completely from his/her imagination and then watch how the human characters adapt to or defy this environment. I think that this type of literature speaks volumes as to how culture and society can influence the human condition. Remember, English nerd over here...I just can't help but over-analyze everything I read...even teen fiction.

As you can imagine, I was super excited when The Hunger Games series came out because it reminded me a lot of the other dystopian books that I had previously enjoyed so much. It did not disappoint. Now, another young adult dystopian series has recently taken over our culture and I have decided to jump on the bandwagon.

Today I am sharing...

Here is a synopsis/review of the book from Amazon:

In Beatrice Prior’s dystopian Chicago world, society is divided into five factions, each dedicated to the cultivation of a particular virtue—Candor (the honest), Abnegation (the selfless), Dauntless (the brave), Amity (the peaceful), and Erudite (the intelligent). On an appointed day of every year, all sixteen-year-olds must select the faction to which they will devote the rest of their lives. For Beatrice, the decision is between staying with her family and being who she really is—she can’t have both. So she makes a choice that surprises everyone, including herself.

During the highly competitive initiation that follows, Beatrice renames herself Tris and struggles alongside her fellow initiates to live out the choice they have made. Together they must undergo extreme physical tests of endurance and intense psychological simulations, some with devastating consequences. As initiation transforms them all, Tris must determine who her friends really are—and where, exactly, a romance with a sometimes fascinating, sometimes exasperating boy fits into the life she's chosen. But Tris also has a secret, one she's kept hidden from everyone because she's been warned it can mean death. And as she discovers unrest and growing conflict that threaten to unravel her seemingly perfect society, she also learns that her secret might help her save those she loves . . . or it might destroy her.

Debut author Veronica Roth bursts onto the YA scene with the first book in the Divergent series—dystopian thrillers filled with electrifying decisions, heartbreaking betrayals, stunning consequences, and unexpected romance.

My thoughts...

I read this entire book in one day. Yes, one day, start to finish. I just couldn't find a good place in the story to stop reading, so I kept going. Jared was shocked that I actually managed to sit all day and read a 487 page book. I don't know why he would be surprised, he's knows I'm a super focused speed reader when I want to be...especially when something is really good. This book was fantastic in one of those addicting, can't-put-it-down sort of ways. It was so good and I am very anxious to read the rest of the series. You can't help but love the main character, Tris. She's your typical independent, rebellious, take-no-shit kind of heroine (think Katniss from Hunger Games) who of course refuses to conform to the standards set forth by the dystopian society. You just have to root for her. One thing I especially liked about Divergent that is different from other traditional dystopian novels is that the characters have a choice about where they belong in the society. Typically, status and roles in these societies are assigned and the characters really have very few options when it comes to changing their fate. I like how the characters in this book have to choose where they think they belong and then live with the extreme consequences that come with their eternal choice. I can't imagine that kind of pressure. What if the path you choose does not turn out the way you thought it would? There's no turning back.

I can't wait to go see the movie version of this book, even though I know that the book will be better because it always is. Plus, I've heard that they changed the ending for the movie. Why do they have to do that crap? If the book is that popular, it's for a reason, so don't go changing important details. Duh.

Bumpdate {32 Weeks}

Uh, so when did it become half way through April already?! Time is definitely not slowing down and this baby is going to be here before we know it. Ahh. Jared and I went on a little shopping spree this weekend thanks to gift cards and such to get some of those absolute must haves that I wanted before Peyton arrives. All of the nursery furniture is here and things are starting to get organized and fall into place. This is really happening y'all, no turning back now.

Week 32: April 9 - April 15

Week 32 Milestones: 

- Baby is the size of a squash this week! I can tell she is packing on the pounds in there because she feels like she is taking up all of the available space. When she moves, I feel it all across my entire stomach, not just in one little spot. Her movement literally makes me stop what I am doing now and watch. It looks and feels like a three-ring circus is going on in there.

- I have gained 35 pounds thus far in my pregnancy, woah mama! My belly button is still in, yay! However, my rings are now officially off, boo. More about that story later on. I guess 1 out of 2 isn't too bad considering we are about to enter week 33 here.

- I have been experiencing a good amount of Braxton Hicks contractions this week. They happen mostly when I am walking a lot or exercising (which is basically the same thing since all I do for exercise is power-walk). It's just weird because I know they aren't real contractions, but it does make me realize that we are fast approaching the real thing here which is so crazy.

- This excessive swelling is no fun y'all. It's still in my feet and ankles and now it has attacked my hands too. At least, it has not made it's way to my face (yet), but I'm sure that's only a matter of time. My new favorite thing to do is Epsom salt baths. Which if you know me at all, you are shocked by this. #1 I hate sitting still and relaxing. #2 I hate taking baths. I can probably count on one hand the number of baths I've taken in my lifetime (other than when I was a small child before I started taking showers instead). Jared and I have lived in our house for 5 years and the garden tub in our master bathroom has never been used, until now. But I was desperate. I hate to admit it, but the Epsom salt baths do work. Not only does it visibly reduce the swelling (not a ton, but enough that I can actually see somewhat of a difference), but it makes my feet feel so much better which is the best part. So for now, Epsom salt is making my swelling manageable and I am oh so happy about that!

- Food preferences: Jared cooked chicken breasts last night to make meals for his lunches for the rest of the week and I thought I was going to hurl. That smell, gag. I honestly don't think I'll ever be able to eat chicken on it's own ever again. As far as cravings, I'm still indulging in waffles and coke icees. I'm also loving fresh veggies and salads, which is pretty much all I want to eat right now. And I just can't get enough milk. Sometimes, I literally drink 4 glasses of milk with one meal. It's just so delicious, and baby girl must be craving some calcium! I'm just so thirsty, in general, all the time. I drink gallons of water each day.

- I am loving our child birth class that we are currently taking! First of all our instructor is an FSU grad (and an ADPi) and she is hilarious. She is so blunt, real and witty when she talks about child birth and I just love her approach. We have been learning so much from her, she has validated a lot of what I thought I wanted out of our birth and she is making me feel really confident in the birth plan that we have chosen. I feel extremely prepared and in control of our birth plan which is an awesome feeling.

I had to have my wedding rings cut off yesterday. Sad face. I literally never take my rings off, except to clean them, and then I put them right back on. I started noticing about a week ago that my hand might be swelling a little bit, but it wasn't too drastic and they weren't bothering me so I didn't think much of it. In the last like three days, the swelling got progressively worse and it got that way fast. I literally woke up one morning with swollen hands and they have been that way ever since. I tried everything to get the swelling in my hands to go down so that I could get my rings off without having to resort to cutting them off. When I noticed that my ring fingers were starting to hurt and tingle and change colors, I looked up all kinds of crazy ideas to get the swelling down, but none of them worked well enough for me to be able to get the rings off. My fingers were too far gone. So yesterday, we went to our family jeweler and he cut them off. I wanted to cry. I was terrified about cutting them, especially my wedding band, because both of my rings are family heirlooms. Our jeweler reassured me that once I wasn't pregnant anymore, he would be able to fix both of my rings and you will never be able to tell that they were ever cut off. Thank goodness. For now, I feel so naked without any rings on, but I'm waiting for my finger to return to a normal shape before I put anything else on it. I did buy a fake wedding band that I plan on wearing until I can wear my real ones again. I know it's ridiculous and superficial, but I just cannot have my pregnant self waddling around without a wedding band on. I can't do it.

After much frustration and impatience, our glider for the nursery has finally arrived! If you remember back a few weeks ago, the glider arrived on schedule and was the wrong fabric/color. We had been waiting for three months already and they sent the wrong stinking one. Let's just say that someone got a nasty phone call about that fiasco. So we had to send that one back and wait for another one. Luckily, they put the new one on super rush (as they should have) and it finally arrived this week. Like I would always tell my students, "if you don't have time to do it right, you better have time to do it again." Just get it right the first time, people. It's not that hard. Now, we finally have the correct glider and it is amazing. Correct fabric and oh so comfy. I can't wait to hang out in it with Peyton!

Now that all the nursery furniture is here and in place, I finally had Jared hang Peyton's monogram on the wall! I am so in love with it.

Book Club

I haven't posted a book review here on the blog in quite a while now. Oh well, there's no time like the present, right? Over the past few months, I have not been doing a good job of giving myself time to read which makes me sad because I absolutely love to read. Well, I take that back. I have been reading, just not fun books. I've been reading articles about pregnancy, babies, reviews of products for babies, etc. It's literally taken over my life. Oye vey. I promised myself that I was going to get back into reading for pleasure, and lately I have finally had the time to do so. Thanks to my insanely swollen pregnancy feet, I have to take time out of each day to sit down, elevate my feet and relax. This is not something I am good at. I especially hate propping my feet up, it makes me feel so antsy and trapped. However, I have found that the only way for me to successfully relax is to read while I do so. It keeps me distracted enough that I forget that I'm antsy and that I want to get up an move around. So now for an hour or two each day, my swollen feet get some relief and I get to enjoy some quality reading time. Win win.

I have finally finished a book that I have been trying to read for a little while now, which is the one I am reviewing today. This book has saved my swollen feet and forced me to sit down and relax.

Today I am sharing...

Here is a synopsis/review of the book from Amazon: 

Marriage can be a real killer. 

  One of the most critically acclaimed suspense writers of our time, New York Times bestseller Gillian Flynn takes that statement to its darkest place in this unputdownable masterpiece about a marriage gone terribly, terribly wrong. The Chicago Tribune proclaimed that her work “draws you in and keeps you reading with the force of a pure but nasty addiction.” Gone Girl’s toxic mix of sharp-edged wit and deliciously chilling prose creates a nerve-fraying thriller that confounds you at every turn. 

   On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri, it is Nick and Amy Dunne’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and reservations are being made when Nick’s clever and beautiful wife disappears from their rented McMansion on the Mississippi River. Husband-of-the-Year Nick isn’t doing himself any favors with cringe-worthy daydreams about the slope and shape of his wife’s head, but passages from Amy's diary reveal the alpha-girl perfectionist could have put anyone dangerously on edge. Under mounting pressure from the police and the media—as well as Amy’s fiercely doting parents—the town golden boy parades an endless series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter—but is he really a killer? 

   As the cops close in, every couple in town is soon wondering how well they know the one that they love. With his twin sister, Margo, at his side, Nick stands by his innocence. Trouble is, if Nick didn’t do it, where is that beautiful wife? And what was in that silvery gift box hidden in the back of her bedroom closet?

   With her razor-sharp writing and trademark psychological insight, Gillian Flynn delivers a fast-paced, devilishly dark, and ingeniously plotted thriller that confirms her status as one of the hottest writers around.

My thoughts...

To say that this book is a psychological thriller is quite an understatement. It is dark and suspenseful in ways I could never have dreamed in my wildest imagination. It keeps you guessing and analyzing every single minute detail with the turn of each page. However, just when you think you have it figured out, each new twist in the story is more shocking than the last. There are so many clues and finite details to figure out the meaning and significance of and just when you think you have accomplished that, you find that those details simply cover up an even deeper meaning. I can't even begin to fathom how an author could write with so many complicated layers as Flynn did in this book. The main characters, husband and wife, are so complex and manipulative that you don't know whether to trust them, like them or hate them. My opinion of them changed constantly throughout the book. Just when I thought I had pinned down that character's personality or motive, another detail came along and changed my entire perspective. The story just became more intense and complicated as you peeled back each layer. I never in a million years could have predicted the ending of this book. In fact, when I first read it, I actually hated the ending. Then, the more I thought about the ending, the more I realized how brilliant it was. It's actually very difficult to articulate my reaction and comprehension of this book without spoiling it. Let's just say that when I came to the end and closed the book, I just sat there. Mind blown. This book turned out to be nothing like I expected, which is what I loved about it.

Nursing Essentials: Mamas Please Help!

With less than 8 weeks to go in this pregnancy, I just realized the other day that it might be helpful for me to start thinking about what I am going to need for myself those first few weeks postpartum. I've been so concerned with getting everything ready that Peyton is going to need, that I forgot all about myself. Which got me thinking...what am I actually going to need in order to nurse this baby once I get home from the hospital? Nursing pillow, check. Nursing cover, check. Pump, check. Other than that, nada. I guess I'll just be sitting around here naked nursing this baby. Won't that be awkward for our family and friends who come to visit? I'm so kidding. But seriously, I need help. What the heck am I supposed to wear?

Since my blog readers are obviously the best mommies out there, I would like to ask y'all for some recommendations regarding nursing essentials. There are so many types, styles, and brands out there that I want to know which ones you real moms like the best!

I like feeling overly prepared so I want to go ahead and get some nursing bras, tanks, dresses...aka: whatever I need to be wearing the first few weeks at home. This is where y'all come in. Which ones were your favorites? What brand? What style? Where did you get it from?

Also, if you have any recommendations on creams, lotions, nursing pads, etc. feel free to offer those up as well. Give me all your secret weapons. Please :)

If you are sitting here, reading this and feeling a little afraid for my child because I seem so clueless, don't worry. I'm taking a breastfeeding class next week so a registered medical professional will be teaching me what to do. Peyton is safe.

In the meantime, I would greatly appreciate it if you could please leave a comment below with any recommendations that you may have for me. Any input will be extremely helpful. Thank you!

Bumpdate {31 Weeks}

The end is fast approaching and there is still so much to do! This next month is all about tying up loose ends and getting everything ready for Peyton's arrival. We are finishing the nursery, taking some prep classes, purchasing those must have items that we didn't get at our showers, etc. I want to have everything ready to go by May so that I can simply just enjoy that final month of pregnancy or in case she decides to come early.

Week 31: April 2 - April 8

Week 31 Milestones:

- Baby is the size of a pineapple this week! She's going through major brain, nerve and eye development currently. Her bones are hardening too, except for her skull. She can also regulate her own body temperature now.

- My total weight gain thus far is 33 pounds. However, I'm pretty sure that at least a solid pound or two of that is solely just from the swelling and fluid in my feet. Otherwise, belly button is still in, rings are still on and zero stretch marks! Maxi dresses are my wardrobe staple at this point. They are so comfortable and they cover my gigantic ankles.

- The amount of fluid in my feet and ankles is out of control. They are so unbelievably swollen that I don't even recognize them. When I look down, they don't look as though they actually belong to my body. I officially own ONE pair of shoes that will actually fit on my feet now...a pair of stretched out J.Crew flip flops that are at least 5 years old. My feet will not fit in any other shoes. I've tried all kinds of things to get the swelling in my feet to go down, but nothing had really been working too well. Luckily, I have an awesome friend who is currently in med school and she serves as my on-call doctor all the time. She gave me a few tips, which totally worked and I am finally getting some relief, yay! Her suggestion that has been working the best is massaging my foot in a way that gets the fluid moving and dispersed. This makes the swelling decrease immensely, but oh my goodness it is so painful. Jared has to do it for me because I can't do it to myself. I can't force myself to inflict this kind of pain upon myself without immediately quitting. Although he doesn't like causing me pain and he says he can actually feel the fluid moving around underneath my skin which is freaky, he does it anyways. Husband of the year. I feel like I can't accurately describe how this kind of pain feels, but imagine that you have an area on your body that is severely bruised and extremely tender from an injury such as a sprain or broken bone. Ok now you have to apply direct, firm pressure on that area by constantly rubbing it. Ouch. That description doesn't even do it justice. However, as Jared massages my feet we can visibly see the swelling going down and he can feel the fluid dispersing which makes my feet feel so much better once he stops touching them. The results are well worth the pain. Unfortunately, my feet balloon back up the next day so we have to do it all over again. Something for me to look forward to everyday for the next 8 weeks. I am seizing this opportunity to practice my breathing and pain management exercises for labor and delivery during this process. Yes, it really is that painful that I have to result to pain management techniques in order to tolerate it. Good news is that I will be such a pro at these techniques when it comes time for my actual labor that I should be more than prepared to tackle a natural child birth.

- Jared and I started two of our child birth classes this week and I love them. They are so interesting and informative. I love learning new things and feeling really prepared. One of the classes focuses on what to do with the baby once you get home...which is something I desperately need instruction in. I literally know nothing about babies or small children. I have changed exactly one diaper in my entire life and have probably only held 3 babies ever. I am the person who politely declines holding other people's infants when they offer because I am so terrified. So I was very excited to take this class because now I feel like my child actually has a chance of survival when I bring her home. The second class we are currently taking is about the actual child birth process. I love getting some insight on what to expect and I find it all extremely fascinating. I'm sure that once Peyton decides that she is ready to make her debut, my motherly instincts will kick in and I'll know exactly what to do. Until then, learning all about it in these classes is definitely putting me at ease and making me feel so much more relaxed and prepared.

- Food preferences: Basically the same, except that I have been substituting my chocolate ice cream for lime sherbet this week. Delicious.

Peyton's dresser and changing table finally arrived! I am so ready to be done with this nursery, and we are still waiting on one last piece of furniture. I can't wait for all the furniture to finally be in place so that I can decorate and get things ready.

I had a slumber party with my Phi Mu family for the weekend!

Jared, Peyton and I were celebrated with a baby shower by our college friends (Read my blog post)

Baby Shower #3

We had our third and final baby shower this weekend and it was a blast! I absolutely love how all three of our baby showers were so unique from one another and really fun in completely different ways. This final shower was a co-ed cocktail party for our college friends. When my sister-in-law, Erika, volunteered to be in charge of this endeavor, she asked me what I really wanted out of this shower. I told her that I wanted it to be #1 co-ed, #2 have plenty of alcohol (just because I can't drink doesn't mean that everyone else should have to suffer too), #3 no participation required (I didn't want people to feel obligated to participate in activities like playing games or watching me open presents) and #4 for everyone to have a good time. I know that some people aren't really a fan of going to showers (especially boys), which is why we opted for more of a cocktail party vibe than an actual baby shower. Jared and I did the same kind of thing for our wedding shower. We had a big 'ole cocktail party with a party bus, and it was probably definitely the most intoxicated bridal shower I've ever attended. So when our baby shower this weekend didn't end until 2am with cigars on the patio and girls dancing in my mom's kitchen, I wasn't remotely surprised. I think we successfully had the most intoxicated baby shower ever (I mean everyone in attendance graduated from FSU, what did you expect?) and I'm so glad that everyone had a good time. That's what I truly wanted :)

 Thank you so much to our fabulous hostesses for throwing such an awesome shower!

I loved the invitation! It was just so me with the quatrefoil, the colors, and the Vera Bradley pattern.

Jared and I are so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing friends and family during this very special time in our lives. Peyton is really lucky to have a ton of awesome "aunts and uncles".

Thank you to my wonderful mommy and Peyton's "DeeDee" for letting us invade her home for our party.

I did open presents at the request of the girls at the shower, while the boys hung out on the patio smoking cigars. 

Peyton and I received so many beautiful gifts which of course included some FSU goodies! I might have the best dressed child on gameday because basically half of her wardrobe is now garnet and gold, which is obviously a must in our household!

Jared's mom passed down her own mother's (Peyton's great-grandmother) pearls for Peyton to have. I absolutely love pearls and I was given my very first set of pearls from my mom when I was initiated into Phi Mu, so I am very excited for Peyton to have her own set. Plus, I just love family heirlooms. What a very special gift for Peyton from her Gramie. 

I was thrilled to have my Phi Mu family with me this weekend celebrating our little legacy!

I loved being reunited with my little, grandlittle and great-grandlittle!

 Peyton's Gramie and Auntie Erika!

The boys spent the majority of the shower on the back patio with their beer and cigars, and I don't blame them. I'm glad they got to hang out and have their man time together :) 

Celebrating our little PBR with some PBR tallboys!

A little thank you gift from me, Jared and Peyton for our shower hostesses! Monogrammed Lilly Pulitzer coolers! I might be going to buy one of these as a birthday present to myself here soon. 

Thank you so much to everyone who came out to our shower and celebrated PBR with us! 

Bumpdate {30 Weeks}

Happy April y'all! This is my favorite month of the year. It has Easter and springtime...oh, and my birthday of course. I'll be turning 27 later on this month (wait, what?!) and in bump related news, we are officially entering the single digit weeks of the pregnancy countdown!

Week 30: March 26 - April 1

Week 30 Milestones:

- Baby is the size of a cucumber this week! She is now strong enough to grasp a finger. Her skin is getting smoother and her brain is getting wrinklier, creating lots of essential brain tissue!

- Well, we hit the 30 pound weight gain mark this week. Which has put me into a whole new, terrifying, weight bracket. My goal was to stay under 40 pounds of weight gain for my entire pregnancy, but I'm not sure that I'm going to make it.

- I'm really excited that I've managed to make it this far with my wedding rings still on and my belly button still in. Please let it continue this way. I have no idea why but the thought of not being able to wear my wedding ring really bothers me. Even though I have a good excuse and I know that majority of pregnant women can't wear their rings toward the end of their pregnancy, I refuse to be a pregnant lady without a wedding ring on. So if the day does come where my own ring doesn't fit anymore, you better believe I will be buying a fake one to wear for the remainder of my pregnancy. Call me crazy, but something about it just seriously bothers me.

- Unfortunately, I think that my cankles are officially here to stay. My feet and ankles are basically swollen 24/7 nowadays. It looks rather ridiculous because I'm still pretty slim everywhere else except for my belly and my feet.

- I keep hearing about this whole "nesting" phase that is supposed to set in and make me want to neurotically clean and organize my house. When exactly is that supposed to happen? Because I'm still not there yet. My dislike for house cleaning is apparently much stronger than a soon-to-be-arriving baby or pregnancy hormones. Not surprised.

- Little Miss Peyton likes to par-tay. She is very active and moves around all day long. I love watching my belly move, it's so fascinating. Sometimes she shoves one of her body parts up under my rib cage which is a little uncomfortable, but I can usually persuade her to relocate with some persistent gentle nudging.

- Food preferences: Still the same song and dance.

- Peyton and I are both happy, healthy and feeling great! I couldn't ask for a more wonderful blessing :)

Jared and I went on a little babymoon to the beach! (Read my blog about it here)

Today is also my mother-in-law's birthday! Peyton and I want to wish you a very Happy Birthday, GiGi!