Scripture Memory {Verse 2}

I have successfully memorized my first verse, hooray! I must say that I'm pretty proud of myself, since memorizing things has not always been my forte in life, unless it was choreography for a dance routine. Put on the music for a song I had a dance to in 8th grade and I can probably still remember most of the choreography...could I actually do it, probably not, seeing as how I am grossly out of shape and no where near as flexible as I was then. (side note: anyone else notice how much pregnancy diminishes your body's flexibility? No fair.) Anywho, now we are on to verse 2 and I am very excited about my new verse!

P.S. - In case you missed the explanation on what I am doing here...short version: I'm memorizing 24 bible verses this year in order to help me get more into the gospel and grow spiritually. Long version: Read my blog post about it here.

Now, back to my new verse. Of course, there is a long-winded story about how I came across this verse and why I have chosen it as one of my memory verses. However, I'll let you in on the verse itself first in case you aren't in the mood to read my extensive ramblings about how I arrived at it. Alas, my second memory verse for 2015 is John 13:34-35...

Story time! First you need a little back story here before we get to the verse. So my church had us fill out these "gospel transformation" cards two weeks ago where we made goals for how we wanted to be transformed spiritually this year. Also on the card, we were to list one thing we want to "quit" this year that will help us in our transformation. My "quit" for this year is negativity. I want to rid my life of anything toxic...people, thoughts, and experiences that make me feel negative. I'm so guilty of whining, complaining and judging others and none of these things ever make me feel any better, just more negative. Therefore, I want to try and be more positive about everything. To surround myself with positive people, flood my brain with happy thoughts and focus more on what is going to make life more of a joyful experience rather than always dwelling on the negative. It's easy to judge others, to complain when things don't go your way, and to just focus on the negative things that are raining on your parade. And I am sick of doing that. Why do I always let one little stupid piece of negativity block out the overwhelming number of blessings in my life? I have so many things to be grateful for and yet, one little thing doesn't go the way I planned it and my whole day is ruined. How pathetic. I'm notorious for letting a bad situation or someone else's negative attitude bring down my spirit, well no more. I want to be happy, positive and nice as much as possible, even when shit hits the fan. I know this is going to be very challenging and I know that I will by no means hit the mark even by the end of the year, but even a little progress is better than none. I want to try and try my best I will. 

Pardon the side road there, but that's important information regarding my verse. So here is how I came about it. I picked out my verse on Wednesday, the day before I had to submit it on the LPM blog because I'm a planner, that's what I do. I picked out a lovely verse (Philippians 4:6-7) and was all ready to go with that on Thursday morning. 

I woke up Thursday morning and opened my Bible app to do my daily reading (yes that's right, your favorite Bachelor-watching, wine-loving blogger also reads her Bible every day) and the verse of the day was: "Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen." (1 John 4:20 NIV) I felt very convicted by this verse as soon as I read it. I thought, yikes, they are talking about me. I claim to love God and yet there are plenty of people out there who I truly dislike and can't stand. Girl just got called out. Ah. So I continued my daily reading which coincidentally happened to be in the book of John that day and it all just kept coming back to the same theme, love and forgive others, no matter what. If Jesus can love and forgive everyone, then so can you. Hmm, well they do have a point there. Next, I opened up my Instagram and the very first picture that popped up was a graphic from She Reads Truth that said "Love each other. John 13:34", and the caption below had the entire verse from John 13:34-35. As soon as I read it, I knew that had to be my verse for the next two weeks. 

I have chosen this verse because I need the reminder, everyday, all day, to love others. It's easy to love the people that you actually like...your spouse, kids, family, friends, etc. It's not so easy to love the people you dislike...that annoying co-worker, neighbor, family member, acquaintance, "frenemie" (don't lie, you all have one), random person in the grocery store line, random person driving slow in front of you when you are late for work, etc. It's really hard to love those people because heck you don't even like them, and maybe they have even done something really bad to you which makes you feel like you have every right to hate them. However, Jesus loved everyone, even the people who betrayed him and murdered him. Now, that's impressive. Trust me, I'm not trying to compare myself to Jesus or claim that I can be like him. Yeah, right. However, I do know that I am capable of trying a little harder to love others. Let's be real, what do you get out of being rude to someone or talking trash about them? Basically nothing. I've noticed that when I'm negative towards other people (even just in my own mind) that I feel crappy and negative too. And when I'm nice and positive towards others, then I feel so much better and happier. Alas, my verse. I want to use it to fight off the negative thoughts in my head. When I see someone doing something that I think is stupid or ridiculous, I want to replace that negative thought with my verse. Who cares if some girl wants to post a billion photos of her baby on Instagram (guilty as charged), I'm going to love her anyway because she is doing what makes her happy. And why does it matter to me if some crazy girl wants to write ridiculously long-winded blog posts (also guilty) and think that she's cool enough for people to actually want to read that garbage, well I will love her too. Challenge accepted. 

I see that what started out as a blog post has now turned into a short novella, sorry y'all. However, this verse just really has me going here. I promise that this is last point that I am going to make about it, so hang in there. The final line of the verse, "Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples", also spoke to one of my gospel transformation goals for this year. To share my faith with others. I'm not a huge fan of people throwing religion into random conversations. I am not one of those people who is going to come right out and ask you about your church, or try to force mine upon you because I just don't feel like that is my place and I don't really even know how to approach that. So I have been looking for ways to share my faith with others without just randomly throwing something like, "Hey, so how 'bout that Jesus guy" into a casual conversation. I feel like this verse finally gave me a little direction in that department. It says that simply by loving others, I can share my faith with the world. Well, that sounds like a manageable task, even for me. Ultimately, loving others seems to be like a pretty good idea in my book so I'm committed to making more of an effort. Love to you all, and free hugs for everyone. (That one is for all my fellow Bachelor fans out there...here's your free hug, don't worry you can get a coupon and redeem it later) 

Have a spectacular weekend and go share some love :)            

Happy Valentine's Day

In case the obnoxious amount of mushy posts on your social media did not already alert you as to what today is, it's Valentine's Day. If you have been reading my blog over the years, then you already know that I am not the biggest fan of this holiday. However, as a married woman I suppose that I am obligated to celebrate it anyways. Don't worry, nothing has changed this year. Jared and I spent exactly zero dollars on each other for Valentine's Day, but that doesn't mean that the sentiment was lost.

I decided that instead of getting Jared a card and letting Hallmark do all the work capturing my feelings, that I would just do it myself. So I wrote him a letter. I am absolutely terrible about verbalizing my feelings, which is something that Jared is actually good at. I'd rather just be quiet than say how I am really feeling. Hence the reason we opted for the generic vows at our wedding. You think I'm actually going to say my feelings out loud in front of a room of 120 people...uh no. On a cold day in you know where. However, I have always been really good at illustrating my feelings in writing. Hence, the blog. If you ever want to really know how I am feelings about something, don't ask me because I won't tell you. Read my blog. There you will find my true feelings. In the past 8 years, I have opened up a lot more about my feelings verbally (Jared has forced me to, darn him), but still if you really want me to pour my heart out, let me write it down.

So back to this Valentine's letter that I composed last night. It is 3 pages long. Typed. And it is a tearjerker, let me tell you. It took me probably an hour to write and I cried most of the time. Pregnancy hormones make something like that perfectly acceptable these days. It's pretty lovey-dovey-mushy, but don't worry there's a little sarcastic wit thrown in every now and then. I know you didn't think I could honestly make it through three whole pages of writing without making a few smart ass comments. Not possible.

I left Jared's letter on the counter for him to read before he went to work this morning. He also left me a letter, which was not nearly as long as mine, but equally as sweet and thoughtful. What can I say, I'm a long-winded writer...but if you read this blog regularly, then you already know that. I blame it on the fact that I spent my entire college career writing 30 page papers. If you can write a 30 page analysis of Steinbeck, then you can write 30 pages about anything. English major problems.

This made me realize something funny about Jared and I and how completely opposite we are in our communication styles. Ask Jared to talk about a topic and he goes on forever. Foooor. Evvvv. Errrr. (Kudos to those of you that picked up on that Sandlot reference) Just ask his Kappa Sigma brothers who had to sit through chapter every Sunday when he was President. Sorry guys, but oh you gotta love him for it. However, ask him to write down something and you get one very concise paragraph, straight to the point. Hello, where did that come from? I, on the other hand, am completely the opposite. Ask me to speak about a topic and you will get 3-5 concise sentences, straight to the point. Heck, it used to take longer to get 150 girls in the room and seated at Phi Mu, then it took for me to conduct an entire chapter meeting when I was President. However, ask me to write about something and you'd think I was publishing a novella on the topic. Case and point right here, I started writing this blog post to tell you about the sweet gesture Jared did for me this morning and here I am on paragraph 5 still not having made my point yet. I promise, I'm getting ready to land the plane y'all.

When I woke up this morning, I found my letter from Jared and three roses from our rose bush in my bud vase on the kitchen counter. How on Earth we managed to have blooming roses on our rose bush in this freezing weather, I have no idea. While my tiny rose blooms hand-picked from my yard may pale in comparison to everyone else's $50 florist arrangements today, I am overwhelmed with emotion when I look at them. I am not even sure if Jared actually realizes the sentimental value behind this gesture for me, so what drove him to do this, I have no idea. Must have been someone up above. I cried when I saw these roses because I immediately thought of my dad. My mom and I share similar views on Valentine's Day and floral arrangements in general. Every Valentine's Day, my mom would always tell my dad not to waste money on store bought flowers for her, so instead he would pick roses from the yard and put them in a bud vase on the counter for her. When I was a kid, we didn't have our own rose bush in our yard so he would go into our neighbor's yard and pick them. (Don't worry we were really good friends with our neighbors, my dad built their house, they didn't mind our trespassing.) Once my parents moved into the house that my mom still lives in now, my dad planted a rose bush in the yard so that he could pick blooms to put in the kitchen for her anytime. I am still in awe that despite the freezing cold outside, three little roses managed to bloom just in time for me on this holiday, carrying on a very special tradition. I couldn't imagine a more perfect Valentine's Day gift.  

I don't typically take photos on Valentine's Day because I don't normally do anything spectacular or worth documenting. However, I did manage to find this photo from Valentine's Day 4 years ago and don't worry, the cuteness factor does not disappoint. Here I am with my little Valentine, Lola, when she was only 2 months old. I want her to be this tiny again. Adorable.

Although I could really care less about this holiday, I can't wait to celebrate next year with our baby girl! Even though I will no longer be Jared's only Valentine, I am so excited to do all the fun kids stuff. Holidays are so much more fun when there are kids around. I can't wait to dress her up in a cute little outfit and take pictures of her and make little Valentines to send out to everyone from her, maybe I will actually become a real fan of this holiday after all. Until then, I better enjoy my last husband and wife only romantic Valentine's Day while I still can. Hope you all have a wonderful holiday weekend! Happy Valentine's Day!

Beyond Friendship

God puts certain people in our lives for a reason. I have always known that I have great friends. I love them and I would do anything for them. This is a simple realization when you are typically the "strong" one. I've pretty much always had it together (or at least that's how I portrayed myself to others), been the responsible one, with what seemed like everything going for me. In college, I was like the mom (it comes with the territory of being a sorority President) always taking care of the other sisters, helping them, talking to them about their problems, being a role model for younger sisters. Now that we have grown up, our needs as a friend have changed. In college, I used to be there for my friends by picking them up from the bar when they needed a safe ride home or laying on the couch with them eating cheez-its and watching trashy TV when their boyfriend was being a jerk. As an adult, I am there for my friends in a different way. Whether it's giving them advice about marriage or helping them look for a new job, proofreading their resume or holding their hand at a family member's funeral, I always want to be there in any way possible. In return, my friends have always been there for me, in my wedding, sending cards to each other for various occasions, taking trips together, basic friend-stuff. I never fully realized how much they had my back until I really needed them. Over the past year and a half, I have come to appreciate how truly precious my friends are.

Good friends are different from family. Not to say that my family is nothing special or important in my life because they absolutely are. But friends are different. Sometimes your family is too close to a situation or too involved. Often times, you need a person from the outside to give you a fresh perspective, or just to listen to you vent. Your friends are there for you because they want to be. They chose you as a friend, treated you like their own family and have chosen to stay by your side even though they had ample opportunity to leave.

To this day, the whole concept behind sororities still blows my mind. On Bid Day, you show up at a house with 60+ other girls from all over the country who you have never met. Inside that house, there is another 150+ girls whom you have also never met from all different walks of life. Four years later, you leave that house with some of the best, lifelong friends you ever could have wished for. How does it all work? I know, you're thinking 200+ women in one house, what a nightmare. But it all seems to work, and I have no clue how. When I went through recruitment, there were 15 houses on FSU's campus (now there are more). Why did I end up at Phi Mu? Who knew that there were girls in that house (or who would come to join that house in the future) who would shape me into the woman I am today? Who knew that some of my closest and dearest friends would eventually show up on the lawn at 823 West Jefferson Street too? I have no explanation for it. The only thing I can figure is that God intervened. He put me on that lawn on that rainy August day in 2005 and He brought the other women I needed in my life to that same lawn on that day and the years that followed. He brought us together for a very specific reason and it wasn't until very recently that I truly understood why.  

On the day I found out about my father's death, I called my closest friends and my sorority family first. They sobbed on the phone with me, offering their condolences and anything they could do to help. Many of them drove for hours or even flew from out of state during the middle of the week, just to be there for me at the funeral. For months afterward, they sent cards and flowers just to say, "I love you and I'm thinking about you". Even a year later, on the anniversary of my father's death, my friends secretly sent flowers to his grave.

Now that we have been going through all these fertility treatments, my friends have been there supporting us each step of the way. Cheering me on with each small victory, and offering inspiration when things aren't going so well. Every day I get messages, texts, and cards in the mail full of encouraging words and prayers from my friends giving me the strength I need to continue on this journey. They always have my best interest at heart and sometimes can offer an outside and unbiased perspective that I desperately need to hear. Each day I thank God for placing each one of these people in my life.

I'm pretty sure that once we find out that we are in fact pregnant (whenever that may be), I honestly think that my friends will be more excited than I am going to be. And let's just say that I am going to be pretty freakin' excited. Even though Jared and I are technically the only two people (well and the fertility doctor/nurses) who are physically involved in conceiving this baby, all of our friends and family are just as much a part of this miracle as we are. They are so emotionally invested in this and I know that there is no way we would be able to do this without them. Team Baby Roche is unstoppable.

This post comes at a time when I am feeling so blessed and overwhelmed with love and support from my friends. What they have offered to me is something far beyond friendship. Thank you to all my friends who have been supporting me over the past year and half. You have no idea how much I appreciate all that you do for me and know that every message, card and prayer truly warms my heart. I love you all very much and I thank God for you everyday.

Intentional Relationships

In church today, our pastor talked about intentional relationships. He spoke about how Jesus intentionally created relationships with people rather than simply preaching or performing miracles from a far. He was able to reach and transform people because he got to know them personally and he got to know them on purpose. As I was sitting in church listening to this message, I couldn't help but think about my dad.

In this regard, my dad was a lot like Jesus. If you knew my dad, you would know that Jesus is not the first thing that comes to mind when you interact with him. He liked to go fishing with his buddies, drink beer and tell dirty jokes...not exactly "Christ-like" qualities, but he was a believer. I'm sure that even he would find my comparison of him to Jesus a little far-fetched as well. However, my pastor always preaches about how we all have spiritual gifts, and today I realized that my dad's spiritual gift was intentional relationships.

Most of us (especially me) go through life just passing people by. We don't stop and take the time to build an intentional relationship with people who aren't our family or friends (and sometimes we don't even build a relationship with the people who are already in our lives). For example, take the person who bags your groceries at Publix. You might see them once a week, exchange the cordial "hi, how are you" and then go about your day. Although you see this person over and over, week after week, you know absolutely nothing about them. Why don't you know anything about them? Do you not have time? Do you just not care? Do you have too many other things to worry about? If we all acted more like Jesus, we would take the time to get to know the people we interact with throughout our day and build an intentional relationship with them.

This is how my dad was like Jesus. My dad got to know every single person he came in contact with. Sometimes he would go to Winn-Dixie for one item and he would be gone for two hours. Why? Because he took the time to engage in a meaningful conversation with each person he interacted with at the Winn-Dixie. He knew every person that worked there. He knew their names. He knew about their lives. He built intentional relationships with these people. Why? Simply because he was friendly and he liked talking to people. And the employees at that Winn-Dixie loved him. Everyone in the store would light up when they saw him come through the door.

When I was a kid, going somewhere with my dad (even somewhere as simple as the grocery store) was like a four hour expedition. My dad stopped and talked to every single person we interacted with. He would ask everyone what their name was and introduce himself. At the time, I found this really annoying. I remember thinking, "why is he doing this? No one cares who he is. Why does he care who this person is? He doesn't know them." I kept wondering why he always wanted to stop and have a "real" conversation with these strangers. I kept wanting to say to him, "just say 'hi' and keep moving".

I don't know about you, but when I go to the grocery store, I try to not engage in conversation with other people. I want to get in and out as fast as I can, so I go for as little interaction as possible. How terrible is that? What is so important in my life that I can't slow down and take a couple minutes to have a meaningful conversation with my cashier, ask her how her day is going and be willing to actually listen to the answer? Maybe I need to be more like Jesus, more like my dad.

Moral of the story: take the time to build intentional relationships with the people around you. Get to know the person who bags your groceries, your next door neighbor, and the barista at Starbucks who makes your coffee every morning. Get to know them and do it on purpose.

Here is my challenge for you this week...go out of your way to be friendly to a complete stranger. Find someone you see around semi-regularly (a neighbor, employee at a business you frequent) and intentionally start a conversation with them that goes beyond a cordial greeting. You might just make their day :) 

Engagement

I have a lot of friends who are currently engaged, which gets me thinking back to when I was simply a fiancée and not yet a wife. Now, I am 5 years wiser with 4 years of marriage under my belt. So obviously that makes me qualified to give all sorts of advice on engagement and marriage. Not really. However, I can say that my husband and I have had to endure some tough life experiences that many couples don't see in their first 20 years of marriage, let alone 4. Therefore, I am dedicating this post to all of my engaged friends out there. The best is yet to come.

Dearest engaged friends,

Enjoy every minute of your engagement. I know that you are probably counting down the minutes until your wedding day, but don't forget to enjoy simply being engaged. You will never get the opportunity to be a fiancé/fiancée again (hopefully), so live it up. I know that planning a wedding can be stressful, but you have forever to be husband and wife. Twenty years from now, you want to be able to look back on your engagement fondly and remember all the fun you had embarking on this new journey together.

Your wedding guests love you and they will have a great time at your wedding no matter what. They don't care what songs the DJ plays or what kind of food is on the buffet. The wedding is about you, don't forget that. They have come to your wedding because they want to see you happy, not for the free bar tab (ok, maybe a little bit for that, I mean who doesn't love a free bar tab? Just kidding).

There is no "right" way to be engaged or have a wedding. Do whatever you want to do and f*** everything else :)

The people in your wedding party are there for a reason. Use them. Their job is not just to stand next to you and look pretty on that special day. Delegate the wedding tasks and have them help you out. Don't be afraid to ask for help. They agreed to be in your wedding party because they love you and they want to help you.

Don't feel pressured to stick to the status quo. Just because you get married doesn't mean you have to buy a house, start a career or have kids right away. Take the time to enjoy being husband and wife. If there is a trip that you always wanted to take, kids and a mortgage can wait. Seize the opportunity to have a really cool experience with your new spouse.

Don't lose your identity. You may have gained a spouse, but that doesn't mean that you have to lose yourself. Spend time apart from your spouse. Spend time alone. Spend time with your friends. You don't have to do everything together. Find activities that you enjoy doing together and activities that you enjoy doing apart.

Things will not go as you planned. And while this might seem tragic at the time, it will make for one hell of a story in the future. Control the things you can control and let go of the things you cannot control.

Take advice from your parents. You can learn so much from them. Whether you learn the things you want out of marriage or the things you don't want out of marriage, they have a lot of wisdom and experience to offer.

Do something for your fiancé/fiancée even if you don't enjoy it simply because you know it makes them happy. Marriage is all about compromise and communication, so why not start now?

It might feel like you can't imagine loving your fiancé/fiancée any more than you do right now, but trust me, you can and you will. It only gets better from here.

If there is anything that I have learned in these past four years, it is to spend every possible moment with the people you love. Tell them that you love them every single day. Our time here is short, so we might as well spend it with the people we love. Best wishes to all the engaged couples out there :)

Men and Cocktails

Have you ever noticed that you can tell a lot about a man by the type of cocktail he chooses to drink? Back when I was single and in college, my best friend and I would totally judge every man in the bar by what he was drinking. If a guy came up to us to flirt, the drink in his hand was usually the determining factor as to whether we were going to be polite and at least cordial enough to say hello or if we were going to laugh in his face and walk away.

Say a guy approaches with a beer in his hand, he at least deserves a polite hello. If he's holding a whiskey, even better. That guy would probably get a full conversation out of us. If we're at a nice bar and he's holding a scotch, we're probably already planning out our wedding vows. On the other hand, if he's holding anything brightly colored or mixed with vodka, he should expect to be laughed at, made fun of and told to go f**k off.

The inspiration for this blog post comes from the book I'm reading, "50 Shades of Grey". I simply can't get over the fact that the author of this book has made Christian Grey's signature cocktail white wine. What a horrendous choice for his character. What kind of man drinks white wine? I'll tell you what kind...a sissy one. White wine is by far the last thing I would ever expect a character like Christian Grey to be drinking. Even red wine would have been a much more acceptable choice. I could also see him drinking like a dirty martini or something; however, the best choice would obviously have been scotch. Perfect example for those of you who watch Gossip Girl...Chuck Bass drinks scotch, need I say more?

Thus leading me to my main point here. What a man's cocktail tells you about him...

White wine - I'm either holding this for my girlfriend while she's in the bathroom or I'm not a real man.

Vodka - same a white wine...or I like to pretend that I'm staring in a rap video being filmed in South Beach

Dirty Martini - the only acceptable reason for a man to drink out of a martini glass simply because James Bond drinks one

Rum - I'm either still in high school or going to a Jimmy Buffett concert

Margarita - only acceptable at Mexican restaurants or on Cinco de Mayo

Beer - I'm planning on drinking for many hours today and I've adopted the mentality that drinking is a marathon not a sprint. I'm taking it easy tonight, I don't feel like blowing a bunch of money, or I'm the designated driver.

Whiskey - I'm a real man's man. They write country music songs about guys like me.

Scotch - the cocktail that screams money, power and class

So next time you head out to the bar, be sure you keep this advice in mind when choosing a man to waste your time on. Trust me, that guy with the vodka cranberry does not know how to do squat. I promise you he won't be able to satisfy your spider-killing/flat-tire-changing/toilet-unclogging needs...or any of your other needs for that matter. Oh my, that was inappropriate...my bad :)

Football vs. Wedding

Football season is a really big deal in my household. Like really big. In fact, I think it might be the most important season of the year. So when it came time for Jared and I to start planning our wedding, he had one stipulation...not during football season. Being a football fan myself, this was an obvious choice. Alas, we were married on May 16th. Yesterday, I came across an article online that literally made me laugh out loud. I guarantee that my husband (and I) would agree 100% with this article and if any of you ladies are planning on marrying a football fan, then I highly recommend that you take this into consideration...

Avoid Being A Horrible Person: 

Your College Football Fall Wedding Guide

By Jason Kirk - College Football Editor (SB Nation)

There's almost never an excuse to have a fall wedding on a Saturday, but if circumstances have left you with no other option, there are still worse Saturdays than others to spend at a wedding.

Here's your complete guide to scheduling a fall wedding: do not ever do it.

Fine, a little more detail. Don't have it on a Saturday in the fall.

If you must have it on a Saturday in the fall, don't live in the South, Midwest, Texas or anywhere else specifically afflicted with the college football condition. Having a fall Saturday wedding in Massachusetts is probably for the best.

But let's say you're stuck with putting on a wedding in the fall. I won't pry into why you've set yourself up like this. We're not here to judge anything other than what a bad person you are.

Now that you've made a mistake, please, please try to proceed with football in mind from this point on. Because you still have to pick a specific Saturday, and certain Saturdays are better than others. This isn't to say that picking the worst college football Saturday is acceptable. Not by any means. Your guests will grumble, huddle around phones, smuggle a TV or just straight up run away.

Last year, I made it out of a fall Saturday wedding for a lifelong friend in 23 minutes, catching up on LSU-Auburn on the way out with a local matriarch who was also leaving early. SB Nation associates were wowed when I declared, "brb wedding," and returned shortly after, but it's a required skill around these parts.

This shit is serious. But you can at least contain the damage by accounting for football.

Take SBNation.com's NFL editor Joel Thorman for example. He's also the founder and editor of Arrowhead Pride, the undisputed best Kansas City Chiefs site. So he needed to arrange his fall wedding to mitigate football losses, even if the only football taken into account was mere pro football.

"The NFL controls bye weeks, but teams can request weeks off," the crafty villain says. "The Chiefs usually request the weekend of the NASCAR race at Kansas Speedway. I planned my wedding that weekend and got lucky when the schedule came out."

The Chiefs' bye is on the third Saturday in October this year, which would make Thorman fit for frying if he tried this in the mid-South. When asked whether the fact that nearby Mizzou is also off that weekend makes him feel any less guilty, Thorman replied, "I guess a little."

(He does not appear to feel guilty whatsoever about any of this.)

But the point remains. If a fall wedding is in the cards, arrange your hand so that you miss the least amount of critical football possible. Therefore, here we have this fall's Saturdays ranked from really bad wedding dates to a couple of the worst possible wedding dates ever.

Note! This isn't a ranking of the weeks as a whole, but just the Saturdays. If you're requiring a multi-day wedding event in the fall, I cannot save you.

1. December 8
The Army-Navy Game. America shouldn't have to send you its gift registry for just a little of your attention once a year, but go ahead and have your wedding if you maybe don't like freedom.

However, FCS playoff action abounds, and your loved ones will have to figure out what that looks like by 2014 one way or another.

2. September 8
A wedding is about the joining together of two families. Have we got the perfect replacement, then: the SEC family absorbing the Missouri and Texas A&M families. With the big out-of-conference games done and most conference action still ahead, this is pretty much your only decent chance for the rest of the year.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Georgia-Missouri, Washington-LSU, Florida-Texas A&M, Penn State-Virginia, Iowa State-Iowa

3. December 1
Conference championship day, plus the second round of the FCS playoffs. But with the Pac-12 game on Friday, we can consider this a window. A really, really slim one.

4. September 29
When conservatives talk about protecting the sanctity of marriage, I assume they're talking about making sure everyone can watch Mike Leach coach against Chip Kelly and Urban Meyer take on maybe the Big Ten's best defense. Can't imagine any other political issue that would have anything to do with marriage.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Ohio State-Michigan State, Arkansas-Texas A&M, Texas-Oklahoma State, Oregon-Washington State, Wisconsin-Nebraska

5. September 15
Significant rivalry action is underway, which means it's far too late to squeeze an acceptable wedding into this season. I'm sorry, but you're now getting married outdoors in July. Linens are recommended.

(Also, I won't list this one among the best games, but can you imagine how cruel you'll feel if you prevent your family from watching Wake Forest beat FSU again?)

Five games your wedding is less important than: Alabama-Arkansas, USC-Stanford, Notre Dame-Michigan State, BYU-Utah, Florida-Tennessee

6. September 22
Brady Hoke seems like a man who'd tell you he prefers a small, traditional wedding, but by the time he's got it all set up, a flamenco band is performing in the nude for thousands from within a Golden Corral chocolate fountain. (You should entrust your wedding to Brady Hoke.)

Five games your wedding is less important than: Michigan-Notre Dame, LSU-Auburn, Clemson-Florida State, Kansas State-Oklahoma, Missouri-South Carolina

7. November 10
College football's best possible wedding crasher duo: Mike Gundy and Dana Holgorsen, yes?

Five games your wedding is less important than: Arkansas-South Carolina, West Virginia-Oklahoma State, Georgia-Auburn, Texas A&M-Alabama, Kansas State-TCU

8. October 6
I left out at least three games here that would've been instant additions to one of the weaker Saturdays, so it's safe to say we've entered the terrible vibes portion of the list. You will get gift cards to Kohl's, which only sells XL Makaveli Branded shirts and purple Clemson flip flops.

Five games your wedding is less important than: West Virginia-Texas, Georgia-South Carolina, Nebraska-Ohio State, LSU-Florida, Washington-Oregon

9. November 17
The impending marriage of Lane Kiffin and Jim Mora surpasses any entertainment you would be able to line up anyway.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Oklahoma-West Virginia, Ohio State-Wisconsin, USC-UCLA, Stanford-Oregon, Iowa-Michigan

10. October 13
Unless you're prepared to serve an entire fried reception, including fried cake and a fried first dance, you probably shouldn't try and pull people away from the Red River Shootout Rivalry Shootout.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Oklahoma-Texas, Stanford-Notre Dame, Alabama-Missouri, USC-Washington, South Carolina-LSU

11. October 20
If you are brave enough to schedule matrimony on a Saturday that's had its own name for decades, be prepared to distribute victory cigars to any survivors.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Alabama-Tennessee, Michigan State-Michigan, LSU-Texas A&M, Penn State-Iowa, Virginia Tech-Clemson (and a rematch of the game that killed the BCS)

12. October 27
The punishment for scheduling an event of any sort during the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party should be having to attend next year's World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Florida-Georgia, Ohio State-Penn State, Michigan State-Wisconsin, Notre Dame-Oklahoma, Michigan-Nebraska

13. November 3
We'll assume you've had a major family hardship this year if you're insisting on this particular date. I'm sorry for your loss, and Grandma June wedding will be dearly missed.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Alabama-LSU, Oregon-USC, TCU-West Virginia, Missouri-Florida, Oklahoma State-Kansas State

14. September 1
Depriving your loved ones of the finest opening day in sports is one thing, but this is going to be an especially great opening day, starting with Notre Dame-Navy in Dublin at 9 a.m. ET. West coasters have to start drinking by like 5 in the morning. Dozens of fan bases enter Sept. 1 with mathematically reasonable championship hopes.

This day is everything. I'm serious. Do not trifle with this day, unless most of your family went to Maryland.

Five games your wedding is less important than: Alabama-Michigan, Auburn-Clemson, Notre Dame-Navy, Urban Meyer's Ohio State debut, Georgia Tech-Virginia Tech, Rich Rodriguez' return, even Indiana is undefeated, Matt Barkley being wonderful, why can't you just let people besides you be happy?

15. November 24
ARE YOU TRYING TO GET SOMEBODY MAIMED?

Games your wedding is less important than: ALL, ABSOLUTELY ALL, YOU DON'T HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU'RE DOING

After all that, you've really got to be high to think a wedding during bowl season will go unchallenged, and the BCS title game is followed by the beginning and end of the NFL year and National Signing Day, all of which leads into March Madness.

As always, May and June are the only acceptable wedding months, and if there's too much competition for those dates among your social circle next year, you're going to have to wait until 2014. This is all for your own good.

Original Source

I hope you learned a lot. If you have already planned for a fall wedding, then go ahead and swallow your pride and make sure that there is a TV available somewhere at the reception. However, if you really want to make your husband happy, then don't get married in the fall. If your husband doesn't care whether your wedding conflicts with football season, then don't marry him. Just kidding...ok, maybe I'm not kidding :) 

Our Anniversary

Today, we are celebrating our 3 year wedding anniversary! I can hardly believe that 3 years have already passed since our big day.

I wrote a blog post all about our special day on our anniversary last year, so if you want to read a little flashback to our wedding day here it is: Today Was A Fairytale

These past three years have been absolutely everything I could have ever hoped for and more. Mind you, not every single day is rainbows and sunshine, but overall I would say that I am a very blessed woman. My husband and I are not one for spending money on each other, we just go do something fun together instead. So in lieu of a four dollar Hallmark card, I decided to dedicate my blog to my awesome husband today.

Here is an entertaining little thank you letter I wrote to my husband on this, our anniversary...

Dear Jared,
        Thank you for being a wonderful husband. You take such good care of me and you are always so sweet and loving. After all, someone in this relationship has to be romantic and we all know that it's not going to be me. Thank you for being a great father to our puppies - cleaning up their gross kennels when they barf in the middle of the night, taking them hunting and showing Sadie love even when she is bad...which is all the time. Thank you for always cooking dinner for us, simply because you are faster and better at it than I am. Thank you for attempting to teach me how to eat healthier, even though I fiercely reject it.  
        Thank you for accepting the fact that if it is 100 degrees outside, I am going to stay in the truck and drink beer while you go stand in the heat for four hours just to watch FSU play football. Thank you for not getting mad when your non-iron Brooks Brothers shirts are all wrinkled because I forgot to take them out of the dryer. Thank you for giving me and hug and handing me a glass of wine when I come home from a bad day at work. Thank you for listening to my crazy stories about my students. Thank you for always offering to help me grade papers. Thank you for jamming out to my really bad music choices in the car with me because you know it makes me happy. 
        Thank you for understanding that when I get together with my sorority sisters, we are going to act like stupid 18 year old girls all over again. Thank you for always pointing out everything you see that has a quatrefoil on it and buying every piece of home decor that I find with a quatrefoil on it. Thank you for providing me with the opportunity to practice my motherhood skills on your drunken fraternity brothers. Thank you for not playing video games in our house because you know I detest them. Thank you for accepting the fact that everything in our house is going to be monogrammed. Thank you for always doing the math for me. Thank you for buying me a china cabinet full of china that I never use just because I felt like it was an integral part of the dining room. 
        Thank you for accepting my blogging/crafting addictions. Thank you for always putting on a smile and posing for a picture with me, just because you know how much I love to take pictures. Thank you for always being silly with me and making me laugh. I'm sure that my parents would take this opportunity to thank you for taking me off of their payroll and removing my messy self from their house. Thank you for always loving me, supporting me, appreciating me and just being the best husband ever. xoxo

Love, Jacki

Happy Anniversary to me! Here's to many, many more :) 

Hall Pass

I know that there are a lot of girlfriends/wives out there who hardly ever let their men out of their sight. However, every now and then they reward their guy with what has been recently coined as a "hall pass", which is essentially a boys night out. I pretty much let my husband go hang out with his friends whenever he wants to because #1: who am I to tell him what he is and is not allowed to do...he's an adult and it's not like I'm his parole officer or something. And #2: I genuinely enjoy spending time by myself. I have never been a needy or dependent type of girl. I really do like being alone. A night out with the boys for him = wine, chick flicks, painting my nails and browsing Pinterest without feeling guilty about ignoring him. Saturday morning golf/hunting/fishing outings (depending on the season) are my favorite time to catch up on my blogging or reading while working on my tan. Now I'm not going to lie, do I occasionally get pissed about him leaving me at home alone, yes. However, that doesn't occur very often and it usually has something to do with the dogs annoying me to death while I'm trying to enjoy my peace and quiet.

I know that you will all probably hate me for saying this, but you need to give your man a break. Dealing with women is a pain and I'm sure they get sick of trying to please us 24/7...so let them go out and have some testosterone-induced fun. Trust me, I don't even like dealing with women for long periods of time, and I understand us, so I can only imagine how they must feel. Are my feelings about boys night out all going to change once we have kids? Probably. But until then, I'll let him enjoy it.

I found this on the internet and thought that it was too funny not to share. This one is for all girlfriends/wives out there who are not as big a fan of boys night out as I am...

Maybe this weekend you should try giving your man a hall pass. I bet he would appreciate it :)

Valentine's Day

For everyone else, today is Valentine's Day, but for me it's just another Tuesday. If you know me well, you know that I am the least romantic person ever. Therefore, anything that has to do with that mushy lovey dovey romantic crap does not make the cut. I know that people really hate those who are cynical and bitter on Valentine's Day, but I'm not saying that everyone else has to hate Valentine's Day just because I don't like it. I just choose not to really celebrate it because I just don't care and I'd rather my husband spend the money on something else. Don't get me wrong, I love to decorate for every holiday, but when it actually comes to celebrating it, I'm not the biggest fan of Valentine's Day. However, if you like all that romantic stuff and you love to celebrate Valentine's Day, then I hope you are having an amazing Valentine's Day this year!

One reason why I dislike Valentine's Day is because I am a teacher. For elementary school teachers, I'm sure Valentine's Day is adorable and fun, but for middle and high school teachers it is a nightmare. The kids act crazy. They are all hopped up on sugar and causing all kinds of drama, like..."my boyfriend bought me a bigger teddy bear than your boyfriend did!" and kids bringing cupcakes and all kinds of nonsense that they want to pass out during class. Not to mention, some of my students don't have the money to spend on some big display of affection for their flavor of the week girlfriend. So much drama. Plus, they think since it is Valentine's Day that all those rules I have about not eating in class and such just magically don't apply on this day. Additionally, they get all mad a me about making them do work because they want pretend like it's elementary school and just have parties all day. Seriously annoying. Needless to say, I'll be celebrating tonight with a big glass of wine.

I'm sure people think I'm crazy for not liking Valentine's Day since I'm married. Yes, I have a guaranteed Valentine every year, but it still isn't that important to me. I don't like romantic stuff, I hate chocolate and all desserts and I don't really get excited about getting flowers, especially roses. I know that some girls love getting flowers, but this is what flowers say in my mind..."just to show you how much I love you, here are some flowers that are going to die in 5 days." Speaking of flowers, this brings me to a funny Valentine's Day story about my husband...

When Jared and I were in college, I expressed my dislike for Valentine's Day but he still wanted to do something for me. I think he was afraid that I would tell him that I didn't want a gift, not really mean it, and then get all pissed off when he didn't get me a gift. He eventually figured out that I'm not one of those crazy girls who thinks that men can read her mind, but instead that whatever I say is what I actually want him to do. Anyways, so we were having a random conversation about roses and how I think that it is so ridiculous for someone to spend $50 on roses on Valentine's Day when the roses are just going to die anyway. So I made a comment to the effect of..."I would rather just get the 50 bucks than the stupid roses". Well, that conversation ended and we went on with our day. A couple days later it was Valentine's Day and I was happy that he got the memo because there wasn't an embarrassing display of roses awaiting me. Instead, he gave me a Valentine's Day card with the check for $50 inside. It was the best Valentine's Day gift ever. I took that $50 and bought a pair of shoes that I'd has my eye on with it. And guess what...I'm sure your roses from that Valentine's Day are rotting in the ground somewhere but those stilettos are still in my closet :)

So whether you are doing anything special or not for this Valentine's Day, I hope you enjoy your day!

Ode to Marriage

On this day in 1974, my daddy and his buddies were running a little late to particularly important event...his wedding. Don't worry they had a good excuse :) Ok, maybe not...guess that depends on who you ask. Not only did this happen to be his wedding day, but it was also the opening day of dove hunting season. If you know my dad and his friends, this is really not surprising at all. Whenever my dad, brother or husband goes hunting or fishing, they always say they will be home at a certain time and I know that all I have to do is simply add about 2-3 hours to that time and that is what time they will actually be home.

Growing up in the South, one thing I learned was to never plan an important event during the fall...unless you want it to be overshadowed by football and hunting season for the rest of your life. Hence the reason I got married in May :)

Luckily, my dad did make it to the church after dove hunting that day and here we are 37 years later. When I was a kid, I was a part of the majority by having parents who were still married, but now I am part of the minority.

Let's be honest, 37 years is a long time...especially when you spend 15+ of those years not only living together but working together as well. My parents are polar opposites, but I think it suits them well. Plus, I like to think that I am nice mix of the two of them. I'm really proud of my parents for not quitting on their marriage when life gets tough, like so many other people do.

So rather than risk getting really sappy with this blog post, since that is not in my nature, I'll just keep it at this: I hope to have a long-lasting marriage that is able to overcome any obstacle, just like my parents. Happy Anniversary mom and dad!

Picture Perfect Thursday

I literally have nothing to write about today, but I'm not going to let that stop me from posting! I'm working the  model home circuit once again today in this fabulous new development called Nocatee in Ponte Vedra. I am obsessed with this place, I would move here tomorrow if I could. Anyways, instead of working on my stuff for my online class while I sit here, I've been playing on Pinterest. So rather than rambling on about nothing in my post today, I'm just going to share some of the pretty things I've found on Pinterest...  

Hello dream backyard :)

                                                                                            Source: tinywhitedaisies.tumblr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Fire pit. Yes, please. 

                                                                                                                         Source: None via Jacki on Pinterest

Everyone needs to print out a copy for their husband/boyfriend.

                                                                                                  Source: sawdustcityllc.com via Jacki on Pinterest

I could definitely sit on my couch and stare at this everyday. 

                                                                                  Source: myuncommonsliceofsuburbia.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Dark wood cabinets, stone hood over the stove...love this kitchen.

                                                                                                               Source: houzz.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                          Source: polyvore.com via Jacki on Pinterest

A dog collar that looks like a bow tie...I must buy Lola one of these.

                                                                                                             Source: dogatar.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Dear shoe fairy, please bring me this closet and all these shoes. Love, Jacki

                                                                                                                       Source: google.com via Jacki on Pinterest

When my dad builds Jared and I our next house, it will look like this. 

                                                                                             Source: architecturaldesigns.com via Jacki on Pinterest

Cute frame and a little chalkboard paint...a new DIY project perhaps?

                                                                                                   Source: farm5.static.flickr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

                                                                                                    Source: sadanduseless.com via Jacki on Pinterest

If I had a garden, it would have a hammock and twinkle lights.

                                                                                                       Source: maluna.tumblr.com via Jacki on Pinterest

The perfect book nook.

                                                                                                              Source: google.com via Jacki on Pinterest

If I had this porch and this view, I would never leave my house. 

                                                                                                         Source: whittenarchitects.com via Jacki on Pinterest

In other news...Happy Birthday Ernest Hemingway! He would be 112 today. Ernest Hemingway is one of my favorite authors which I know is really weird because I'm a girl and most women hate Ernest Hemingway. I absolutely love his writing, hence the reason I am so obsessed with going to Sloppy Joe's every time I go to Key West. He wrote one of my favorite books of all time while sitting in Sloppy Joe's. My top two favorite books by Ernest Hemingway are The Sun Also Rises and The Garden of Eden. If you have never read either of them, you should. They are short reads and the characters are scandalously intriguing.

I hope you enjoyed all my pretty pictures :) Have a great Thursday!

Valentine's Day

I have always had mixed feelings about Valentine's Day. My like or dislike of this holiday has really never had anything to do with whether or not I happened to have a significant other on this particular day, but mostly because this day revolves around a bunch of things I just really could care less about.

First of all, I do not like chocolate or any other dessert. That being said, I seriously thought I was going to vomit like 4 times today. Every class period, my students just kept bringing in more and more cupcakes and those nasty cookies that have like 8 pounds of frosting on each cookie...yuck. I also received tons of chocolate from my students. I appreciate the thought, but what am I going to do with all this chocolate? So if anyone is in the mood for chocolate, please come over to my house and rid me of it.

Secondly, I do not like anything that revolves around romance. I could quite possibly be the most unromantic person on the face of this earth. Most men are more romantic than I am. I have been giving Jared death threats for about a week now about surprising me with roses and crap at school today. I know that some people love those public displays of romance, but I could not imagine anything more horrifying.

Lastly, I've got much better things that I could be doing with $50 than staring at roses that will be dead in a couple days. In fact, one year for Valentine's Day I told Jared that I would much prefer that he just write me a check for $50 rather than waste the money on flowers. I was being sarcastic of course, but when the holiday rolled around he actually just gave me a card with the check inside. I took that money and bought myself a new pair of shoes...best Valentine's Day ever.

Actually that is a lie, the best Valentine's Day I ever had was the year that Jared gave me his Kappa Sigma lavalier, aww. So I guess that was kind of romantic...actually I can't believe that I just typed that sentence...gag.

While I like to do my fair share of complaining about Valentine's Day, there are some things that I do like about it. In school, Valentine's Day usually meant some sort of art activity that involved coloring, and boy do I love to color :) Plus, I really like decorating for holidays, so any excuse to put up cute decorations makes me happy. I also love the color pink and using excessive amounts of pink during February is perfectly acceptable.

This year for Valentine's Day, not a whole lot is going on around here...just the way I like it :) When Jared gets home from work we are just going to cook dinner over the fire pit and enjoy some wine tonight.

As much as I try to avoid romance, Jared just has to sneak little bits of it in there sometimes. On Saturday, he brought me home flowers early for Valentine's Day. However, he couldn't just get the cliche red roses because he knows that I don't really like roses. Oh no, he had to be his romantic self and put much more effort into it than that. So instead of the traditional Valentine's flowers, he bought me potted tulips. He bought me tulips because they are my favorite flower. He bought them for me in a pot rather than cut or in an arrangement because after Valentine's Day he is going to transplant the tulips into my flower pot outside so that I can enjoy them longer and because he knows I like to have pretty flowers in front of the house. I mean seriously...who puts that much logic and thought into buying flowers? I guess someone trained him well...thanks Gina :)  

Although my students were absolutely crazy today, observing middle schoolers partake in such a holiday is very entertaining. Oh the drama. I love watching my students get all worked up over teddy bears, candy and cards when I know good and well that they aren't going to give a crap about the boy who gave them that balloon by next week. Plus, I bet no one at your work gave you a sweet Justin Bieber or Hannah Montana valentine today, did they? Apparently Justin Bieber says that I am a rock star teacher. Be jealous :)

Happy Valentine's Day! xoxo

Happy Birthday Sadie!

I can hardly believe that my little puppy Sadie is turning 4 today! It seems like only yesterday Jared was bringing her home from the breeder and she was so tiny. Sadie is a German Shorthair Pointer, a breed used specifically for bird hunting. She was the first dog that Jared and I got together; I even came up with the name Sadie. Technically Jared bought her, but since we were already dating at the time I immediately claimed partial ownership :)

On Easter weekend in 2007, Jared and my brother, Chris, made the journey to Gainesville, Georgia to pick up Sadie. They didn't want to spend the night in North Georgia so they left Tallahassee in the middle of the night, and drove all the way there just in time to make it to the breeder's house by 8am. They picked up Sadie, turned right around and drove her down to my parents' house in Jacksonville.

She was so precious and tiny! My brother also has a German Shorthair (pictured below) and Sadie looked so small compared to his dog, Bailey. Four years later, Sadie is definitely bigger than Bailey.

I was so excited for Sadie to arrive! She was quite the snuggler right from the beginning and she still is; however, she currently weighs over 50 pounds but still thinks that she only weighs 10 pounds.

Then she started to grow and that brought the energy! Most dogs have lots of energy as a puppy and then they start to mellow out and calm down as they get older...apparently we picked the wrong breed for that. German Shorthairs are high energy dogs by nature and it never goes away. Sadie acts as crazy and energetic today as the day we brought her home.

In the fall of 2007, Sadie was introduced to quail hunting. She caught on quickly and she followed Bailey's lead very well. Sadie LOVES to hunt. When Sadie sees Jared starting to get together the hunting gear on a Saturday morning, she goes bonkers. On the average hunting trip, she spends about 4 hours running non-stop at her top speed and when the hunt is over she isn't tired, she wants more.

Going hunting just to see Sadie in action is totally worth the trip. Without these dogs, quail hunting would be next to impossible. Obviously there is some training involved, but these dogs really just go on natural instinct when it comes to finding the birds and pointing. It's what they were born to do :)

Sadie is a wonderful dog, but she has had her fair share of spankings. Even when she gets sick in her kennel, chews up my hair straightener (only as a puppy), or steals Jared's sandwich off the kitchen counter, we still love her.

Happy 4th Birthday Sadie!