Beyond Friendship

God puts certain people in our lives for a reason. I have always known that I have great friends. I love them and I would do anything for them. This is a simple realization when you are typically the "strong" one. I've pretty much always had it together (or at least that's how I portrayed myself to others), been the responsible one, with what seemed like everything going for me. In college, I was like the mom (it comes with the territory of being a sorority President) always taking care of the other sisters, helping them, talking to them about their problems, being a role model for younger sisters. Now that we have grown up, our needs as a friend have changed. In college, I used to be there for my friends by picking them up from the bar when they needed a safe ride home or laying on the couch with them eating cheez-its and watching trashy TV when their boyfriend was being a jerk. As an adult, I am there for my friends in a different way. Whether it's giving them advice about marriage or helping them look for a new job, proofreading their resume or holding their hand at a family member's funeral, I always want to be there in any way possible. In return, my friends have always been there for me, in my wedding, sending cards to each other for various occasions, taking trips together, basic friend-stuff. I never fully realized how much they had my back until I really needed them. Over the past year and a half, I have come to appreciate how truly precious my friends are.

Good friends are different from family. Not to say that my family is nothing special or important in my life because they absolutely are. But friends are different. Sometimes your family is too close to a situation or too involved. Often times, you need a person from the outside to give you a fresh perspective, or just to listen to you vent. Your friends are there for you because they want to be. They chose you as a friend, treated you like their own family and have chosen to stay by your side even though they had ample opportunity to leave.

To this day, the whole concept behind sororities still blows my mind. On Bid Day, you show up at a house with 60+ other girls from all over the country who you have never met. Inside that house, there is another 150+ girls whom you have also never met from all different walks of life. Four years later, you leave that house with some of the best, lifelong friends you ever could have wished for. How does it all work? I know, you're thinking 200+ women in one house, what a nightmare. But it all seems to work, and I have no clue how. When I went through recruitment, there were 15 houses on FSU's campus (now there are more). Why did I end up at Phi Mu? Who knew that there were girls in that house (or who would come to join that house in the future) who would shape me into the woman I am today? Who knew that some of my closest and dearest friends would eventually show up on the lawn at 823 West Jefferson Street too? I have no explanation for it. The only thing I can figure is that God intervened. He put me on that lawn on that rainy August day in 2005 and He brought the other women I needed in my life to that same lawn on that day and the years that followed. He brought us together for a very specific reason and it wasn't until very recently that I truly understood why.  

On the day I found out about my father's death, I called my closest friends and my sorority family first. They sobbed on the phone with me, offering their condolences and anything they could do to help. Many of them drove for hours or even flew from out of state during the middle of the week, just to be there for me at the funeral. For months afterward, they sent cards and flowers just to say, "I love you and I'm thinking about you". Even a year later, on the anniversary of my father's death, my friends secretly sent flowers to his grave.

Now that we have been going through all these fertility treatments, my friends have been there supporting us each step of the way. Cheering me on with each small victory, and offering inspiration when things aren't going so well. Every day I get messages, texts, and cards in the mail full of encouraging words and prayers from my friends giving me the strength I need to continue on this journey. They always have my best interest at heart and sometimes can offer an outside and unbiased perspective that I desperately need to hear. Each day I thank God for placing each one of these people in my life.

I'm pretty sure that once we find out that we are in fact pregnant (whenever that may be), I honestly think that my friends will be more excited than I am going to be. And let's just say that I am going to be pretty freakin' excited. Even though Jared and I are technically the only two people (well and the fertility doctor/nurses) who are physically involved in conceiving this baby, all of our friends and family are just as much a part of this miracle as we are. They are so emotionally invested in this and I know that there is no way we would be able to do this without them. Team Baby Roche is unstoppable.

This post comes at a time when I am feeling so blessed and overwhelmed with love and support from my friends. What they have offered to me is something far beyond friendship. Thank you to all my friends who have been supporting me over the past year and half. You have no idea how much I appreciate all that you do for me and know that every message, card and prayer truly warms my heart. I love you all very much and I thank God for you everyday.